


we're going down together

by reddishblue



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defenders
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Aged-Up Character(s), Chatting & Messaging, College AU, Dirty Jokes, F/M, Fluff, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Humor, M/M, Memes, No Plot/Plotless, Pining, Romance, Slow Burn, Suggestive comments, Texting, Transfluid Pidge | Katie Holt, Unreliable source of college life, groupchat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-29
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-05-15 12:12:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 26,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14790315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reddishblue/pseuds/reddishblue
Summary: LEGendary:like what i said Hunk,,,LEGendary:hakuna matatahunkuna matata:sighBeing a college student is hard. Especially without friends. Lance, Pidge and Hunk are on their third year and is trying their best. Keith is doing just fine and doesn't know about the ways of friendship. Matt wants to party and memes all day. Allura doesn't go to class a lot yet somehow still managed to get a high score. Shiro just wants a fucking nap and to go to Sephora.Allura decides to create a groupchat with all her friends and mutuals. Just for fun and laughs.She did not expect what happened within the groupchat. Filled with tons of memes, anime character, movie quotes, shenaningans, pranks, possible murders and fights, angst, dirty jokes, sexual tension and pining, the shipping is everywhere! No one had expected this (they had).And of course, friendships and hardships are the most important ships of all.[ DISCONTINUED ]





	1. it is born

**Author's Note:**

> Shiro: teaches in uni  
> Matt and Allura: senior  
> Keith: junior  
> Lance, Pidge and Hunk: middler  
> this fic starts at September

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **sirpidgeot:** eXCUSE _ME???_
> 
>    
>  **razzledazzle:** ur excused lmao
> 
> jumping into the gc bandwagon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shiro: 24 (February 29) -College Teacher  
> Allura: 22 (February 14) -Senior  
> Matt: 22 (March 17) -Senior  
> Keith: 21 (October 23) -Junior  
> Hunk: 20 (January 13) -Middler  
> Lance: 20 (July 28) -Middler  
> Pidge: 18 (April 3) -Middler
> 
> This story starts at the start of the year aka September

_**queen allura** created a Groupchat_

 

_**queen allura** added **sirpidgeot, cinnamon rolls, death take me now, kogayass, razzledazzle** to the Groupchat_

 

_**queen allura** named the Groupchat: **Hoes**_

 

 

**Hoes ( 03:10 AM )**

 

 

 **sirpidgeot:** what the fuck Allura

 

 **sirpidgeot:** why are you awake?? it's like 3 AM??

 

 **queen allura:** Why are _you_ awake?

 

 **sirpidgeot:** okay, _touché_

 

 **sirpidgeot:** still, what the fuck is this

 

 **queen allura:** A?? Groupchat??

 

 **sirpidgeot:** yeahi know,,,

 

 **sirpidgeot:** i mean for what?

 

 **queen allura:**  Because apparently we've been friends for who knows how long yet we never have a gc and I want to talk to you guys without seeing all of your faces

 

 **queen** **allura:**  And do I need a reason to talk with my friends?

 

 **sirpidgeot:** i

 

 **sirpidgeot:** understandable have a nice day

 

 

**Hoes ( 07:32 AM )**

 

 

 **razzledazzle:** what the _fuck,_ Allura

 

 **cinnamon rolls:** dude just scroll up

 

 **razzledazzle:** Hunk,,,, my everything and more

 

 **razzledazzle:** you know im too lazy to do that

 

 **cinnamon rolls:**...

 

 **queen allura:** for gODS SAKE LANCE

 

 **queen allura:** JUST SCROLL THE FUCK UP

 

 **razzledazzle:** sheesh fine, calm your shit

 

 **razzledazzle:** alyt, i get it

 

 **razzledazzle:** sometimes i wanted to talk to u guys without seeing all ur ugly faces too

 

 **cinnamon rolls:** excuse me

 

 **razzledazzle:** of course not you, sweetie! ur a blessing among men

 

 **queen allura:** Excuse me???

 

 **razzledazzle:** not you too, 'Lura! ur a queen, a blessing among women!

 

 **sirpidgeot:** eXCUSEME????

 

 **razzledazzle:** ur excused lmao

 

 **sirpidgeot:** i

 

 **kogayass:** what the hell is this.

 

 **queen allura:** I SWEAR if anyone ask about this AGAIN

 

 **cinnamon rolls:** scroll up Keith

 

 **razzledazzle:** woah woah woAH

 

 **razzledazzle:** what the hell is Mullet doing in this holy gc??

 

 **razzledazzle:** and when??

 

 **razzledazzle:** and WHY??

 

 **sirpidgeot:**  cuz he's our friend

 

 **sirpidgeot:**  and my favorite friend

 

 **kogayass:** thanks Pidge, you're my favorite too.

 

 **sirpidgeot:** <3

 

 **kogayass:** <3

 

 **razzledazzle:** eXCUSE ME??

 

 **sirpidgeot:** ur excused bitch

 

 **queen allura:** OHHHHHH

 

 **cinnamon rolls:** SHOTS FIRED

 

 **razzledazzle:** HUNK??? U TRAITOR

 

**razzledazzle _changed_ cinnamon rolls' _name to_ sinnamon roll**

 

 **sinnamon roll:** eh, fair

 

 **kogayass:** and here we have folks, a Lance McClain in his natural habitat.

 

 **razzledazzle:** fight me

 

 **kogayass:** meet me in the fucking pit

 

 **death take me now:** No one is fighting in the pit.

 

 **death take me now:** Go to your classes now.

 

 **cinnamon roll:** whoops, sorry Shiro

 

 **razzledazzle:**  sorry dad

 

 **sirpidgeot:** yourenot my dad

 

 **death take me now:** I have a Matthew Holt with me

 

 **sirpidgeot:** im on my way to my class as we speak

 

 **kogayass:** it's true, i saw him.

 

 **sinnamon roll:** i, like the good cinnamon roll i am, wait hold on

 

**sinnamon roll _changed_ sinnamon roll's _name to_ cinnamon roll**

 

 **cinnamon roll:** anyway

 

 **cinnamon roll:** im in my class like the cinnamon roll i am

 

 **queen allura:** This is why you're my favourite child

 

 **razzledazzle:** oh YEAH??

 

 **razzledazzle:** well,,,

 

 **razzledazzle:** IM SHIRO'S FAVORITE

 

 **death take me now:** Incorrect.

 

 **kogayass:** it's Pidge.

 

 **sirpidgeot:** wait wat

 

 **razzledazzle:** oh wow i did not see it coming

 

 **razzledazzle:** thEN IM CORAN'S

 

 **razzledazzle:** where is that gorgeous man anyway??

 

 **queen allura:** Herefuses to have a phone

 

 **queen allura:** Something about a bet with Alfor

 

 **sirpidgeot:** wait,,,

 

 **razzledazzle:**  ??

 

 **cinnamon roll:** yeah??

 

 **sirpidgeot:** if im Shiro's, Lance is Coran's and Hunk is Allura's,,,

 

 **sirpidgeot:** then what about our emo son??

 

 **razzledazzle:** LMAO

 

 **cinnamon roll:** that's unfair, our group has like, 7 people

 

 **cinnamon roll:** and only 3 are considered adults

 

 **sirpidgeot:**  Allura just acts like one

 

 **queen allura:**  Eh true

 

 **queen allura:** Most of the time I have absolutely no idea what I am doing at all

 

 **kogayass:** i don't care.

 

 **kogayass:** i'm an independent gay man, i dont need this shit.

 

 **death take me now:** Keith, just last night I have to cook you dinner.

 

 **death take me now:** All because you're too lazy to make one and I know you will starve yourself.

 

 **cinnamon roll:** what

 

 **cinnamon roll:** that's it

 

 **cinnamon roll:**  Keith you are coming to our dorm tonight

 

 **cinnamon roll:** i'm gonna cook for you

 

 **razzledazzle:** wHAT

 

 **razzledazzle:** since when is this shit happening??

 

 **cinnamon roll:** since i realize how Keith starve himself when he's too lazy

 

 **queen allura:**  Can I join?? I miss your cooking :( They're very great

 

 **queen allura:**  My cooking sucks

 

 **death take me now:** Me too.

 

 **death take me now:** Your cooking gives me life, it gives me reason to live and continue being a teacher in this uni.

 

 **cinnamon roll:** thats a dark compliment

 

 **cinnamon roll:** but ill take it! so everyone's coming to our dorm!

 

 **razzledazzle:** w00t partay!!!1!!1!

 

 **sirpidgeot:** and you didnt ask my permission because ...?

 

 **death take me now:** How does a picture of Matt doing embarrassing things do for you?

 

 **sirpidgeot:**  5 of it and it's a deal

 

 **cinnamon roll:** okay! it's official! food party at our dorm!

 

 **cinnamon roll:** also lance get your ass here, class is about to start

 

 **razzledazzle:** shit

 

 **razzledazzle:** gotta dash

 

 **death take me now:** What the fuck, Lance.

 

 **kogayass:** he says fuck.

 

 **sirpidgeot:** DAD SWORE!!!

 

 **queen allura:**  Disappointed but not suprised

 

 **death take me now:** Don't you guys have class?

 

 **queen allura:**  No class today

 

 **kogayass:** my class starts at 10.

 

 **sirpidgeot:** i AM at the class, inside the class and yet,,,

 

 **sirpidgeot:** the teacher isnt inside

 

 **sirpidgeot:** the teacher is you

 

 **sirpidgeot:**  Shiro where the fuck are you

 

 **death take me now:** What.

 

 **death take me now:** It's Tuesday.

 

 **sirpidgeot:** its thursday Shiro

 

 **death take me now:** death take me 

 

 **kogayass:** lmao

 

 **queen allura:** lmao

 

 **sirpidgeot:** lmao

 

 

**Hoes ( 11:46 AM )**

 

 

 **razzledazzle:** lmao

 

 **cinnamon roll:** lmao

 

 **death take me now:** I hate this family, I'm leaving.

 

 **sirpidgeot:** that's my line

 

 **kogayass:** abandoned yet again.

 

 **queen allura:** Shiro how dare you leave us

 

 **razzledazzle:** oHANA MEANS FAMILY

 

 **cinnamon roll:** AND FAMILY MEANS NO ONE IS LEFT BEHIND

 

 **death take me now:** Did you just quote lilo & stitch?

 

 **razzledazzle:** IT IS A GREAT MOVIE SHUT UP

 

 **kogayass:** did you know that lilo means lost and stitch means that it's stucked together, so lilo  & stitch means lost & gets back together.

 

 **cinnamon roll:** i

 

 **cinnamon roll:** beautiful

 

 **sirpidgeot:** why do you even know this

 

 **kogayass:** why not?

 

 **sirpidgeot:** touché

 

  
**Hoes ( 06:03 PM )**

 

 

 **cinnamon roll:** so when are you guys coming?

 

 **kogayass:** i'm already here Hunk, just feed me. leave them starved.

 

 **sirpidgeot:** dont you dare to start it now, im not there yet

 

 **razzledazzle:** well hurry up gremlin

 

 **sirpidgeot:** this is why youre not my favorite friend Lance

 

 **queen allura:**  I'm going there at 7

 

 **queen allura:**  Actually no I'll be there in 30

 

 **sirpidgeot:** at least i wont be the latest, shiro's not there yet

 

 **death take me now:** Jokes on you, Pidge, I'm already here.

 

 **cinnamon roll:** it's true, he's the first to arrive

 

 **sirpidgeot:** well shit

 

  
**Hoes ( 09:41 PM )**

 

 

 **queen allura:** thank you Hunk!!!

 

 **queen allura:**  It was delicious

 

 **kogayass:** and thanks for the extra food.

 

 **kogayass:** i won't have to cook for a week.

 

 **death take me now:** More like I don't have to cook for you for a week.

 

 **death take me now:** But really thanks Hunk it was better than great.

 

 **death take me now:** It was like a religious moment.

 

 **cinnamon roll:** oh you guys,,,

 

 **sirpidgeot:**  Lance is pouncing him for a hug

 

 **sirpidgeot:** [ _image ]_

 

 **queen allura:** cuteeee  <3

 

 **cinnamon roll:** but alas, no homo bro

 

 **razzledazzle:** no homo

 

**sirpidgeot:** _[ image ]_

 

 **kogayass:** that's gay.

 

 **kogayass:** i would know, i am gay.

 

 **queen allura:**  I seconded that

 

 **queen allura:** Trust me my uncle is gay

 

 **death take me now:** That is not gay. That is bromance.

 

 **death take me now:** I would know, I know Matt.

 

 **sirpidgeot:** that reminds me

 

 **sirpidgeot:** let's not add him here

 

 **kogayass:** who??

 

 **queen allura:** Matt?

 

 **sirpidgeot:** shhh, he gets stronger everytime someone says his name

 

 **death take me now:** Matt is not Voldemort, Pidge.

 

 **sirpidgeot:** he could be

 

 **razzledazzle:**  i finally let go of Hunk to see what u guys talking about

 

 **razzledazzle:** and im disappointed but not suprised

 

 **death take me now:** Isn't that my line?

 

 **cinnamon roll:** why are we talking about Matt?

 

 **sirpidgeot:** because i am warning you guys not to add him in this holy groupchat

 

 **razzledazzle:** oh honey, this gc isn't holy ever since Mullet is here

 

 **kogayass:** for the last time it's not a mullet, Lance.

 

 **razzledazzle:** sounds fake but ok

 

 **sirpidgeot:** so that is our one and only rule

 

 **sirpidgeot:** do not and i mean DO NOT

 

 **sirpidgeot:** ADD MATT IN THIS GROUPCHAT

 

 **sirpidgeot:** and i hope yall follow this

 

**kogayass _added_ mattheo latte _into the chat_**

 

 **sirpidgeot:** the aUDACITY

 

 **sirpidgeot:** YOU HAVE ONE RULE KEITH

 

 **sirpidgeot:** ONE

 

 **kogayass:**  i don't know what you think of me, Pidge. i never listen to the rules.

 

 **cinnamon roll:** a Pidge Gunderson in its natural habitat

 

 **cinnamon roll:**  betrayal

 

 **mattheo latte:** lmao succ

 

 **mattheo latte:** also what the fuck is this shit

 

 **queen allura:** jESUS CHRIST

 

 **death take me now:** I guess Matt's dead

 

 


	2. code #467

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which we soon knows everyone's sexuality, Lance realizes he's been a jerk and The Garrison Trio has a code

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i guess there is HINTED pining Keith, but not really,,,  
> just gonna post because i will probably forget to post it

**Hoes** **(09:12 AM)**

 

 

 **razzledazzle : **looking back into our past convo,,,

 

 **razzledazzle:** realizing something

 

 **razzledazzle:** dID SHIRO JUST TYPE LMAO??

 

 **razzledazzle:** am i riGHT OR AM I RIGHT

 

 **death take me now:** Happens everytime there's a special occasion.

 

 **death take me now:** AKA when there's a Matt Situation.

 

 **death take me now:** Or when Keith is getting bullied.

 

 **kogayass:** well fuck you too, Shiro.

**mattheo latte:** ;)

 

 **sirpidgeot:** gay

 

 **mattheo latte:** that's homophobic

 

 **sirpidgeot:** im mattphobic actually

 

 **mattheo latte :** >:0

 

 **cinnamon roll:** why are you even looking back into our past convo

 

 **kogayass:** yeah, stalkerish much?

 

 **razzledazzle:** 1) fuck off keith

 

 **razzledazzle:** 2) cuz im a bored bitch

 

 **razzledazzle:** which reminds me, are we all not straight?

 

 **razzledazzle:** like, are we all part of a LGBT+ ?

 

 **queen allura:** I heard LGBT+ and I came here as fast as I can

 

 **queen allura:** Also yeah duh

 

 **razzledazzle:** bisexual and loud

 

 **queen allura:** pansexual and proud

 

 **kogayass:** didn't we all met at GSA??

 

 **sirpidgeot:** no that's where i met you

 

 **sirpidgeot:** we all met during the pride day

 

 **kogayass:** well shouldn't that be obvious then??

 

 **razzledazzle:** JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION MULLET

 

 **kogayass:** fuck off, Lance.

 

 **kogayass:** also im gay obviously.

 

 **kogayass:** read the name.

 

 **razzledazzle:** yes thank you for stating the obvious _NEXT_

 

 **cinnamon roll:** man you know im pansexual

 

 **sirpidgeot:** asexual my dudes

 

 **mattheo latte:** wait so lemme get this straight,,,

 

 **razzledazzle:** more like let me run this _bi_ you

 

 **sirpidgeot:** let's _ace_ -cess the situation

 

 **cinnamon roll:** let's _pan_ this out!

 

 **kogayass:** imgay

 

 **death take me now:** ...

 

 **death take me now:** Let's just _queer_ out the situation.

**mattheo latte:** did u just

 

 **razzledazzle:** ANYWAY

 

 **razzledazzle:** matt, say it, out loud

 

 **mattheo latte:** VAMPIRE

 

 **cinnamon roll:** nice reference, not what we meant

 

 **mattheo latte:** okay so

 

 **mattheo latte:** im...

 

 **mattheo latte:** im a....

 

 **kogayass:** he's homoflexible.

 

 **mattheo latte:** im a flaMING HOMOFLEXIBLE MAN

 

 **mattheo latte:** GODDAMIT KEITH

 

 **mattheo latte:** WHY

 

 **kogayass:** you're taking too much time just to say it.

 

 **kogayass:** so i said it for you.

 

 **kogayass:** you're welcome :)

 

 **razzledazzle:** am i the only one who got chills when i see keith's :) ?

 

 **sirpidgeot:** nah i felt it

 

 **cinnamon roll:** me too

 

 **queen allura:** I'mbeside him?? And I can actually feel the chills surrounding him??

 

 **queen allura:** Keith how the fuck did you do that

 

 **kogayass:**???

 

 **kogayass:** i have no idea what you're talking about.

 

 **mattheo latte:** sure u dont,,,

 

 **mattheo latte:** sure

 

 **mattheo latte:** i will get to the bottom of this

 

 **mattheo latte:** i will, mark my WORD

 

 **kogayass:** yea sure whatever.

 

 **death take me now:** I regret many things.

 

 **death take me now:** This is one of them.

 

 **death take me now:** Introducing Keith to all of you.

 

 

 

  
**sunshine >>> my heart and soul**

 

 

 **sunshine:** Lance

 

 **my heart and soul:** Hunk

 

 **sunshine:** _Lance_

 

 **my heart and soul:** okay ur serious

 

 **my heart and soul:** waddup

 

 **sunshine:** look,,,

 

 **sunshine:** i know you and Keith had this "rivalry" going on

 

 **my heart and soul:** theRE IS STOP USING QUOTATION MARK

 

 **sunshine:** but can you please stop being a jerk to him??

 

 **sunshine:** it's mean

 

 **sunshine:** and uncalled for

 

 **my heart and soul:** wat

 

 **my heart and soul:** wAt

 

 **my heart and soul:** i am NOT being mean to him

 

 **sunshine:** i have proofs

 

 **sunshine:** dont tempt me Lance

 

 **sunshine:** dont

 

 **my heart and soul:** i

 

 **my heart and soul:** holY SHIT I HAVE

 

 **my heart and soul:** CODE 467

 

 

 

  
**sunshine >>> pidgee**

 

 

 **sunshine:** pidGE

 

 **sunshine:** CODE 467

 

 **sunshine:** I REPEAT CODE 467

 

 **sunshine:** THIS IS NOT A DRILL

 

 **sunshine:** where the fricKLE FRACKLE ARE YOU???

 

 

 

  
**sunshine >>> mattie yolk**

 

 

 **sunshine:** do you know where Pidge is?

 

 **sunshine:** we're having a bro-problem here

 

 **sunshine:** also why did you name yourself mattie yolk on my phone

 

 **mattie yolk:** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

 **mattie yolk:** she's with Keith

 

 **mattie yolk:** better ask him

 

 **sunshine:** k, thanks

 

 

 

  
**sunshine >>> keef**

 

 

 **sunshine:** do you know where Pidge is?

 

 **keef:** she's with me.

 

 **keef:** why?

 

 **sunshine:** call her to go back to dorm

 

 **sunshine:** just say it's code 467

 

 **keef:**?? 

 

 **sunshine:** just do it

 

 **keef:** okay, she just ran

 

 **keef:** what's code 467?

 

 **sunshine:** sorry buddy

 

 **sunshine:** can't tell you

 

 **sunshine:** just something that us trio aka Lance, Pidge and I have to do

 

 **keef:** why? is Lance ok?

 

 **sunshine:** ...

 

 **sunshine:** why are you only asking about him

 

 **keef:** because?? i saw Pidge and you're texting me??

 

 **keef:** that leaves Lance.

 

 **keef:** so this is about Lance, right?

 

 **keef:** wait, why did you ask why i'm asking about him?

 

 **sunshine:** ahhh

 

 **sunshine:** nevermind

 

 

 

**Voltron (03:33 AM)**

 

 

 **sirpidgeot:** so remember our chat about LGBT shit and stuff?

 

 **sirpidgeot:** i spy someone who didnt say anything about his sexuality

 

**sirpidgeot _changed_ Hoes _to_ does shiro is gay?**

 

 **sirpidgeot:** i shall wait for your answer Shiro

 

 **mattheo latte:** lmao what the fuck pidgeotto

 

 **sirpidgeot:** fuck off mattington

 

**mattheo latte changed sirpidgeot's _name to_ pidgeotto**

 

**pidgeotto _changed_ pidgeotto's _name to_ sire pidgeot**

 

 **sire pidgeot:** what the fuck this app didn't let me to change my name back to the old one??

 

 **mattheo latte:** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

 

 

**does shiro is gay? ( 08:51 AM )**

  
**razzledazzle:** answer the question

 

 **cinnamon roll:** answer it

 

 **queen allura:** guys wanna bet on what his sexuality is?

 

 **queen allura:** i bet $30 he's bi

 

 **death take me now:** Allura?

 

 **death take me now:** No hesitation, oh wow.

 

 **razzledazzle:** $20 he's gay

 

 **cinnamon roll:** $25 he's ace

 

 **cinnamon roll:** anyone else?

 

 **kogayass:** not joining.

 

 **razzledazzle:** why, you scared?

 

 **kogayass:** no.

 

 **kogayass:** itwould be unfair if join.

 

 **kogayass:** considering i know the answer.

 

 **razzledazzle:** gonna give us a clue, Keith?

 

 **sire pidgeot:** normal Lance: Mullet, a Lance that wants something: Keith

 

 **sire pidgeot:** know the difference, kids

 

 **kogayass:** haha no.

 

 **kogayass:** i wanna watch all yall fail.

 

 **sire pidgeot:** keith,,,

 

 **sire pidgeot:** i love you but we dont need your texan bullcrap here

 

 **sire pidgeot:** also $30 he's actually straight

 

 **mattheo latte:** $19.80 he's bi too

 

 **cinnamon roll:** why the .80??

 

 **mattheo latte:** look,,,

 

 **mattheo latte:** it's the only money i have left okay???

 

 **razzledazzle:** so... shiro which are you??

 

 **death take me now:** ugh

 

 **death take me now:** I'mgay.

 

 **death take me now:** Demisexual gay more specifically.

 

 **razzledazzle:** alRIGHT RAZZLE DAZZLE

 

 **razzledazzle:** ill be waiting for your money everyone ;))))

 

 **sire pidgeot:** what

 

 **sire pidgeot:** the

 

 **sire pidgeot:** fuck

 

 **cinnamon roll:** gdi i forgot his gaydar is pretty good

 

 **razzledazzle:** excuse you?? my gaydar is _ALWAYS_ good

 

 **queen allura:** well goodbye $40

 

 **queen allura:** you're in the hands of a weird guy now

 

 **razzledazzle:** excuse you

 

 **mattheo latte:** wait WHAT 

 

 **mattheo latte:** but... my gaydar is good!

 

 **kogayass:** the first time we met, you thought i was straight

 

 **kogayass:** you finally figured im gay when you see me kissing a dude

 

 **kogayass:** face it, your gaydar is broken

 

 **kogayass:** like beyond repair

 

 **cinnamon roll:** rude, but true

 

**mattheo latte _changed_ mattheo breaks' _name to_ mattchiato**

 

**mattchiato _changed_ kogayass' _name to_ queefers**

 

 **queefers:** oh wow

**queefers:** how do you change names here help

 

 **razzledazzle:** haha succ

 

 **death take me now:** lmao

 

 **queefers:** i hate yall

 

 **queen allura:** Notexan bullshit here

 

 **queefers:** fuck off you brit.

 

 **queefers:** drink your stupid tea.

 

 **queen allura:** >:0

 

 

 

 

**tide podge >>> the golden trio**

 

 **tide podge:** sooooo

 

 **tide podge:** code 467? again?

 

 **tide podge:** i thought weve talked abt this shit yesterday

 

 **hunkuna matata:** yea he's not convinced

 

 **tide podge:** why are we chatting?

 

 **tide podge:** we could just?? talk??

 

 **tide podge:** like the normal person we are??

 

 **LEGendary:** lmao we're far from normal

 

 **hunkuna matata:** he refuses to talk to us

 

 **hunkuna matata:** and somehow these walls are?? soundproof??

 

 **hunkuna matata:** this college dorm is weird

 

 **LEGendary:** so i feel like a jerk

 

 **LEGendary:** again

 

 **tide podge:** yeah, you should be

 

 **hunkuna matata:** dont worry dude

 

 **hunkuna matata:** Keith doesnt mind

 

 **hunkuna matata:** even tho you've been an awful jerk to him and always insult him

 

 **LEGendary:** he STARTED IT

 

 **tide podge:** he?? didnt??

 

 **LEGendary:** ANYWAY

 

 **LEGendary:** i WILL stop being a jerk to him

 

 **hunkuna matata:** by apologizing?

 

 **tide podge:** by acting like adults?

 

 **LEGendary:** what

 

 **LEGendary:** that's stupid

 

 **LEGendary:** im just gonna ignore him forever, duh

 

 **tide podge:** i

 

 **tide podge:** for 2 yrs???

 

 **hunkuna matata:** dude that's literally impossible

 

 **LEGendary:** NOT WITH THAT ATTITUDE, ITS NOT

 

 **LEGendary:** ill ignore him until he graduates

 

 **tide podge:** how??

 

 **LEGendary:** with determination

 

 **hunkuna matata:** orrrr,,,

 

 **hunkuna matata:** you could apologize?

 

 **hunkuna matata:** to make it easier for all of us

 

 **LEGendary:** thats stupid

 

 **tide podge:** youre stupid

 

 **LEGendary:** whAt????

**tide podge:** i said youre stupid

 

 **LEGendary:** THATS STUPID

 

 **hunkuna matata:** sigh

 

 **LEGendary:** anyway it's official

 

 **LEGendary:** im gonna ignore him

 

 **hunkuna matata:** im worried

 

 **LEGendary:** hunk,,,

 

 **LEGendary:** hakuna matata

 

 **tide podge:** hakuna my tities Lance

 

 **LEGendary:** lmao wat tities

 

 **tide podge:** >:0

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keith, reading Hunk's text about him questioning Lance's issue: ohshitfuckgoddamitcaLMYOURSHITKEITH THINK REASONABLY. DO NOT ACT LIKE A PINING FOOL YOU ARE.
> 
> Hunk, reading Keith's text about Lance: ?? Why is he only questioning Lance?? Unless.... 
> 
> Hunk, reading Keith's reply: Oh wait nevermind then...
> 
> Keith, also reading his reply: Oh thank God, it sounds reasonable
> 
>  
> 
> i love stealthy!pining keith,,,


	3. the sighing symphony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> where puns are made and Keith and Lance have The Chat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> clickbaited, clickbaited, you just got clickbaited  
> also please kudos im an attention whore thank you  
> im actually not posting this daily, but i got lots of free time soooo *slides in new chapter*

**does shiro is gay? (12:13 PM)**

 

 

 **cinnamon roll:** soooo

 

 **cinnamon roll:** this gc is fuckin dead

 

 **razzledazzle:** _gasp_

 

 **razzledazzle:** hunK JUST SAYS FUCK

 

 **sire pidgeot:** wAt

 

 **queen allura:** Hunk I expect more from you

 

 **mattchiato:** a ciNNamOn rOll???

 

 **mattchiato:** i dont think so,,,

 

**razzledazzle _changed_ cinnamon roll's  _name to_ not innocent**

 

 **death take me now:** I'm not mad at you, Hunk.

 

 **death take me now:** I'm just disappointed.

 

 **queefers:** how do you change names????

 

 **not innocent:** guys

 

 **not innocent:** seriously

 

 **razzledazzle:** im  _cereal,_ Hunk

 

**razzledazzle _changed_ razzledazzle's  _name to_ cereal**

 

 **cereal:** ;)

 

 **sire pidgeot:** Lance,,,

 

 **sire pidgeot:** stop  _mocha-_ ing him

 

**sire pidgeot _changed_ sire pidgeot's _name to_ mocha**

 

 **mocha:** ;)

 

 **queen allura:** Pidge, Lance, don't be  _mint_ to him

 

 **queen allura:** ;)

 

 **not innocent:** why are everyone making  _puns?????_

 

 **death take me now:** Hunk,

 

 **death take me now:** This whole groupchat is a pun.

 

 **mattchiato:** my name is a fucking pun

 

 **queefers:** my name  _USED_ to be a pun.

 

 **queefers:** if only  _someone_ could tell me how to change t _HE FUCKING NAME._

 

 

 

 

**does shiro is gay? (02:34 AM)**

 

 

 **queefers:** seriously guys?

 

 **queefers:** i can see you motherfuckers reading this.

 

 **mocha:** go to sleep, Keith

 

 **queefers:** fuck off, gremlin.

 

 **mocha:** excuse you, im a lake monster like my bae Nessie and Bessie

 

 **mattchiato:** _nah,,,_

 

 **mattchiato:** ur definitely a gremlin

 

 **mocha:** >:0

 

 

 

 

**LEGendary >>> the golden trio**

 

 

 **LEGendary:** did u guys see what i did there?

 

 **hunkuna matata:** see when you fall down from the stairs?

 

 **tide podge:** see u falling  _up_ the stair?

 

 **LEGendary:** wat

 

 **LEGendary:** no wtf

 

 **LEGendary:** do  _NOT BRING UP THOSE DARK DAYS_

 

 **tide podge:** it literally happened a few hours ago

 

 **LEGendary:** _nOPE DONT REMEMBER DIDNT HAPPEN_

 

 **tide podge:** u really like to use that dont you

 

 **LEGendary:** _yes_

 

 **LEGendary:** anyway we're getting off topic

 

 **LEGendary:** i mean whEN I DIDNT EVEN MOCK KEITH

 

 **LEGendary:** OR EVEN AKNOWLEGE HIM

 

 **tide podge:** that is  _not_ how u spell acknowledge

 

 **LEGendary:** _inconsequential_

 

 **hunkuna matata:** you could spell inconsequential, yet you cant even spell acknowledge??

 

 **LEGendary:** again,,

 

 **LEGendary:** inconsequential problems

 

 **LEGendary:** so one week down,,,

 

 **hunkuna matata:** and like many more months to go

 

 **hunkuna matata:** i still think you should just go and apologize to him

 

 **tide podge:** i seconded that 

 

 **LEGendary:** offer is declined, blocked, and reported

 

 **LEGendary:** do not talk to me or my son about that bullshit every again

 

 **hunkuna matata:** _sigh_

 

 

 

 

**does shiro is gay? (03:54 AM)**

 

 

 **death take me now:** Can we  _please_ change the groupchat's name?

 

 **death take me now:** It's been driving me mad since yesterday.

 

**mocha _changed_ does shiro is gay?  _to_ cha cha slide**

 

 **death take me now:** Better.

 

 **death take me now:** also go to bed, Pidge.

 

 

 

 

**cha cha slide (02:30 PM)**

 

 

 **cereal:** _DAD STRIKES AGAIN_

 

 **not innocent:** _WITH HIS DAD ADVICES_

 

 **death take me now:** Christ.

 

 **queen allura:** _lmao_

 

 **queen allura:** Shiro's pain is my joy

 

 **mattchiato:** same

 

 **death take me now:** Then you must be happy all the time.

 

 **queefers:** cAN ANYONE  _PLEASE_ TELL ME HOW TO CHANGE MY NAME??

 

 **mocha:** suffer and die, Keith

 

 **mocha:** _suffer and die_

 

 **mocha:**   _DIE_

 

 **queefers:** is this because i blue shell'd you in Mario Kart?

 

 **mocha:** _suFFER AND DIE_

 

 **death take me now:** Something is missing.

 

 **queen allura:** Suspicious

 

 **mattchiato:** y'know this is probably the part where Lance will fight with Keith

 

 **cereal:** haha Keith who?

 

 **queefers:** um?? me??

 

 **death take me now:** _sigh_

 

 **death take me now:** Where areth thou, death?

 

 

 

 

**cha cha slide (10:23 AM)**

 

 

 **cereal:** ello mi dudes

 

 **cereal:** ya boi is at the college's café

 

 **cereal:** because this college is so fucking  _extra_

 

 **cereal:** anyway,,

 

 **cereal:** anyone wants some coffee?

 

 **cereal:** or something else?

 

 **queefers:** can you buy me a latte?

 

 **cereal:** whoops all of a sudden im no longer in the café, oh well

 

 **cereal:** sorry Keith, maybe next time

 

 **queefers:**??

 

 **queefers:** okay??

 

 **mocha:** _sigh_

 

 

 

 

**LEGendary >>> the golden trio**

 

 

 **LEGendary:** 2 weeks strong guys!!!1!

 

 **hunkuna matata:** _sigh_

 

 **tide podge:**   _sigh_

 

 

 

 

**kogayass >>> sharpshooter**

 

 

 **kogayass:** hey are you ok?

 

 **sharpshooter:** yeah?? 

 

 **sharpshooter:** why wouldn't i?

 

 **kogayass:** nothing,,

 

 **kogayass:** it's just...

 

 **kogayass:** you've been acting weird lately.

 

 **kogayass:** i've actually haven't been seeing you since like, last week?

 

 **sharpshooter:** two weeks actually

 

 **kogayass:** okay then, two weeks, that's one week more than i imagined.

 

 **kogayass:** it's almost as if you're ignoring me.

 

 **kogayass:** wait a minute.

 

 **kogayass:** are you ignoring me????

 

 **sharpshooter:** lmao 

 

 **kogayass:** LANCE??

 

 **kogayass:** have you been ignoring me??

 

 **sharpshooter:** lmao

 

 **kogayass:**  LANCE, ANSWER ME

 

 **kogayass:** i can see you reading this

 

 **kogayass:** LANCE

 

 

 

 

**kogayass >>> the stars**

 

 

 **kogayass:** Lance is ignoring me, isn't he?

 

 **the stars:** yep

 

 **kogayass:** may i ask why?

 

 **the stars:** he realized that he's been a jerk to u and instead of apologizing

 

 **the stars:** like the adult he was supposed to be,,,

 

 **the stars:** he ignored you so he wont say stupid things

 

 **kogayass:** sigh

 

 **kogayass:** i'll talk to him

 

 **the stars:** please,,,

 

 **the stars:** he's driving me insane

 

 

 

 

**kogayass >>> sharpshooter**

 

**kogayass:** Lance

 

 **kogayass:** we are going to have a chat

 

 **kogayass:**  and if you're not answering this,

 

 **kogayass:**  i will climb to your fucking window and have this ridiculous chat face to face

 

 **kogayass:** answer my call Lance.

 

 **sharpshooter:** hokay okay!!

 

_**... calling sharpshooter**  
_

 

**_[call ended 3:18:43]_ **

 

 

 

 

**LEGendary >>> the golden trio**

 

 

 **LEGendary:** so me and Keith have taken care of our problems and issues

 

 **tide podge:** more like YOUR issue and problems

 

 **hunkuna matata:**  finally

 

 **hunkuna matata:**  so you've finally realize that apologizing is the best way?

 

 **tide podge:** and that you should act like a fucking adults you are?

 

 **LEGendary:** fine,,,

 

 **LEGendary:** you guys were right, bla bla bla

 

 **LEGendary:** but at least i could ignore him for two weeks!

 

 **LEGendary:** THATS DEDICATION RIGHT THERE

 

 **hunkuna matata:** or just plain stubborn

 

 **tide podge:** or stupid pride and ego blinding you

 

 **LEGendary:** BUTTTTTT

 

 **tide podge:** haha you say butt

 

 **LEGendary:** like what i said Hunk,,,

 

 **LEGendary:**  hakuna matata

 

 **hunkuna matata:** _sigh_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bet yall wanted to know what happen at the 3 hours long talk Keith and Lance have right??? ;))
> 
> well guess what? me too
> 
> i might make a series just to put that talking-scene they have IF i have any idea how to describe it,,,


	4. exPOSED

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **not innocent:** oh wow guys, can we not?
> 
>  
> 
>  **mocha:** yeah can we not?
> 
>  
> 
>  **mocha:** like, Matt is like a brother to me
> 
>  
> 
>  **mattchiato:** i hate to scare you Pidge
> 
>  
> 
>  **mattchiato:** but i AM ur brother

**cha cha slide (03:24 AM)**

 

**cereal _changed_ cereal's _name to_ loverboy lance**

 

 **loverboy lance:** whaddup binches

 

 **not innocent:** Lance

 

 **not innocent:** you know i love you

 

 **loverboy lance:** and i heart u too bby

 

 **not innocent:** but you are really testing my patience

 

 **loverboy lance:** ???

 

 **loverboy lance:** i did nothing bad

 

 **loverboy lance:** i am merely,,,,,,

 

 **mocha:** cursing us with that awful song?

 

 **loverboy lance:** moRE LIKE BLESSING U GUYS WITH QUEEN B

 

 **loverboy lance:** smh guys

 

 **not innocent:** get your beauty sleep Lance

 

 **loverboy lance:** i dont need those ;)

 

 **loverboy lance:** for i am beauty already

 

 **mocha:** why u lyin bruh

 

 **loverboy lance:** >:0

 

 **mattchiato:** lmao burn

 

 

 

 

**cha cha slide (09:42 AM)**

 

 

 **queen allura:** Wow smh guys Queen B is great

 

 **death take me now:** I think she's too overrated.

 

 **mocha:** seconded

 

 **loverboy lance:** how dare

 

 **loverboy lance:** the betrayal

 

 **not innocent** : thirded

 

 **loverboy lance:** HUNK?????

 

 **mattchiato:** lmao top 10 anime betrayal

 

 **not innocent:** after the 23rd time you wake me up from my sleep

 

 **not innocent:** i dont think so buddy

 

 **loverboy lance:** oh YEAH?!

 

 **loverboy lance:** at least i still have Keith!

 

 **loverboy lance:** right, buddy?

 

 **queefers:** tell me how to change my name then maybe i will be.

 

 **loverboy lance:** ...

 

 **loverboy lance:** aT LEAST I HAVE ALLURA

 

 **queefers:** wow.

 

 **queefers:** you guys really like my name as queefers huh.

 

 **mattchiato:** duh

 

 **loverboy lance:** yup

 

 **mocha:** totally

 

 **queen allura:** Of course

 

 **not innocent:** yeah dude

 

 **death take me now:** :) _YES_

 

 **queefers:** well shit.

 

 **mattchiato:** like Beyoncé?

 

 **loverboy lance:** gasp

 

 **queefers:** i'll be honest, Beyoncé is like Starbucks,

 

 **queefers:** known by many people, overrated and is actually just fine.

 

 **loverboy lance:** now you listen here, you emo bitch

 

 **loverboy lance:**   _[ video ]_

 

 **mocha:** ... ... ...

 

 **mocha:** is that the fucking G-Note?

 

 **loverboy lance:** yes

 

 **queen allura:** Lance!

 

 **queen allura:** You shouldn't attack him with that sad song!

 

 **not innocent:** welp here comes the emo tears

 

 **mattchiato:** hoW DARE YOU 

 

 **loverboy lance:** wat

 

 **mattchiato:** THAT'S IT

 

 **mattchiato:** DON'T TALK TO ME OR MY SISTER EVER AGAIN

 

 **mocha:** im he/him today

 

 **mattchiato:** oh im sorry pidge

 

 **mocha:** it's cool, i havent told u yet

 

 **mattchiato:** DONT TALK TO ME OR MY BROTHER EVER AGAIN

 

 **loverboy lance:** wAT???

 

 **not innocent:** didnt see that coming

 

 **death take me now:** I'm unadopting you.

 

 **queen allura:** Is that even a word?

 

 **death take me now:** How dare you bring up those days.

 

 **death take me now:** G-Note is officially unallowed to be played from now on.

 

 **mattchiato:** HERE HERE

 

 **loverboy lance:** well shit im dadless

 

 **loverboy lance:**  anyone wanna be my daddy?

 

 **mocha:** eat shit Lance

 

 **loverboy lance:** :(

 

 **loverboy lance:** all i want is to G-Note Keith

 

 **queefers:** you played yourself, Lance.

 

 **queefers:** i don't listen to MCR.

 

 **queefers:** Ony P!ATD and FOB for me.

 

 **loverboy lance:** wAT

 

 **loverboy lance:** but?? ur emo??

 

 **queefers:** i'm really not.

 

 **queefers:** half of my clothes are hand-me-down from Shiro.

 

 **mocha:** wait wHAT

 

 **queen allura:** Okay I seriously did _NOT_ see this coming

 

 **loverboy lance:** SHIRO???

 

 **loverboy lance:** UR CLOTHING STYLE IS SHIT

 

 **death take me now:** I'm sorry that I'm too emo for you, Lance, but at least I'm not in denial of my emo phase.

 

 **not innocent:** he got you there, buddy

 

 **loverboy lance:** NOPE

 

 **queefers:** here we go

 

 **loverboy lance:** DONT REMEMBER DIDNT HAPPEN

 

 **mocha:** i literally have pics of that phase Lance

 

 **queen allura:** Why the quiznak you lyin'?

 

 **mattchiato:** it's ok Lance, i had an emo phase too and look at me now!

 

 **loverboy lance:** a weeb?

 

 **mattchiato:** nO

 

 **mattchiato:** A MEMELORD DUH!!!

 

 **mattchiato:** WHY WOULD I BE A WEEB????

 

 **death take me now:** Ignore Matt, Lance, he's _ALSO_ still in denial of his anime phase.

 

 **mattchiato:** i do not! have! an anime! phase!

 

 **queen allura:** Matt,

 

 **queen allura:** Just yesterday you Naruto runs through the hall.

 

 **mattchiato:** Keith did that too!

 

 **not innocent:** Keith is an anime protagonist, Matt

 

 **queefers:** no i'm not.

 

 **not innocent:** you have an anime backstory, your hair is styled like an anime boy character aka long but not long, your eyes are bigger than normal, you dress like one and you have a bike.

 

 **queefers:** you got me there.

 

 **mocha:** so the duo memelords are in denial of their phase, what's new?

 

 **death take me now:** What's new is that you guys are going to have your test and none of you are studying.

 

 **loverboy lance:**  well ur not my dad anymore so hah!

 

 **death take me now:** Lance.

 

 **loverboy lance:** im sorry dad, forgive me, ive sinned

 

 **mattchiato:** or also known to meant im sorry daddy ive been naughty

 

 **death take me now:** Good news guys! Language is now banned.

 

 **mattchiato:** but daddy

 

 **death take me now:** Daddy is NOT my kink.

 

 **loverboy lance:** kinkshaming is my kink ;)

 

 **not innocent:** no

 

 **not innocent:** no kinkshaming here

 

 **loverboy lance:** awww

 

 **loverboy lance:** boo you whore

 

 **not innocent:** did you just call me a whore?

 

 **loverboy lance:** if ure into it, sure ;)

 

 **mocha:** ugh

 

 **mocha:** stop talking

 

 **queen allura:** Kinky ;)

 

 **mocha:** aLLURA???

 

 **queen allura:** My kink is kinkshaming too Lance UwU

 

 **loverboy lance:** OwO

 

 **queefers:** this groupchat is disgusting.

 

 **mocha:** you and me both

 

 **mattchiato:** as if u dont have a kink Keith ;)

 

 **queefers:** i do.

 

 **mocha:**  wait wat

 

 **queefers:** i just don't say it to my friends at the groupchat.

 

 **mocha:** KEITH HAS A KINK??

 

**mocha _changed_ cha cha slide _to_ keith is a kinky boi**

 

 **queefers:** i didn't even tell you my kinks, Pidge.

 

 **mocha:** knowing you it's probably either _very_ vanilla or _very NOT_

 

 **mocha:** no in between

 

 **queefers:** can we NOT talk about my kinks.

 

 **loverboy lance:** u didnt deny it

 

 **death take me now:** Can we _please_ not talk about my little brother's preference situation in sex?

 

 **queen allura** **:** YOU COULD JUST SAY KINK WE'RE NOT KIDS

 

 **mattchiato:** oh sweetie, we still love u no matter what ur kink is

 

 **mattchiato:** so i have bite kink

 

 **loverboy lance:** same

 

 **queen allura:** Ditto

 

 **not innocent:** oh wow guys, can we not?

 

 **mocha:** yeah can we not?

 

 **mocha:** like, Matt is like a brother to me

 

 **mattchiato:** i hate to scare you Pidge

 

 **mattchiato:** but i AM ur brother

 

 **mocha:** oh

 

 **mocha:** i forgot lol

 

 **queen allura:** You guys literally look alike??

 

 **queen allura:** How could you forget?

 

 **mocha:** cuz he sucks

 

 **mattchiato:** oh i sure sucks a lot ;)

 

 **death take me now:** _Matt._

 

 **queefers:** from Queen B to kinks.

 

 **queefers:** how could we get so far?

 

 **loverboy lance:** wiTH HORNINESS

 

 **queefers:** bye

 

 

 

 

**shirogone >>> lancey lance**

 

 **shirogone:** Keith, my main man

 

 **shirogone:** so u know that Jesus knows what we want, He just wants u to say it to Him,

 

 **shirogone:** does that mean He has begging kink?

 

 **shirogone:** boi u better answer me

 

 **shirogone:** u bitch ill sell u to satan for a fucking cornchip answer me

 

 **lancey lance:** ... Shiro?

 

 **shirogone:** oH SHIT

 

 **shirogone:** fuckkkk

 

 **lancey lance:** SHIRO????

 

 **shirogone:** :)

 

 **shirogone:** yeet

 

 **lancey lance:** wAT THE FUCk

 

**[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]**

 

 **lancey lance:** HOW DARE U LEAVE ME HANGING

 

**[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]**

 

 

 

 

**LEGendary >>> the golden trio**

 

 

 **LEGendary:** _[ image ]_

 

 **tide podge:** Lance,,,

 

 **tide podge:** how many times should i tell u

 

 **tide podge:** NOT to photoshopped a conversation

 

 **LEGendary:** iM NOt

 

 **hunkuna matata:** oh my gosh Lance, havent you learn your lesson?

 

 **LEGendary:** fOR THE LAST TIME IM NOT EDITING THIS

 

 **hunkuna matata:** ... wait

 

 **hunkuna matata:** youre tellin me

 

 **hunkuna matata:** yoURE SERIOUS?

 

 **LEGendary:** yES

 

 **tide podge:** wAT

 

 **tide podge:** we need an explanation

 

 **hunkuna matata:** so???

 

 **hunkuna matata:** let's just?? ask??

 

 **tide podge:** but subtlely

 

 **LEGendary:** in the gc?

 

 **tide podge:** i said subtlely u buffoon

 

 

 

 

**keith is a kinky boi (10:12 PM)**

 

 

**mocha _changed_ mocha's name _to_ green alien**

 

 **green alien:**   _[ image ]_

 

 **green alien:** SHIRO EXPLAIN

 

 **loverboy lance:** how subtle

 

 **not innocent:** i agree HOW subtle i cant even

 

 **green alien:** shut ur trap

 

 **green alien:** sHIRO RISE AND EXPLAIN

 

**death take me now _has left the chat_**

 

 **green alien:** are u fucking kiddin me???

 

 **green alien:** MATT RISE

 

 **mattchiato:** ...

 

 **queen allura:** I'm with Matt

 

 **queen allura:** Dont worry, he's just in shock

 

 **mattchiato:** wHAT THE FUCK

 

 **mattchiato:** aLL THIS TIME WE COULD BE SHITPOSTERS BUDDIES

 

 **mattchiato:** OH TAKASHI TAKASHI

 

 **mattchiato:** wHEREFORE ART THOU TAKASHI

 

 **queen allura:** It's where art thou you uncultured swine

 

 **mattchiato:** FUCK OFF

 

 **not innocent:** hey why not ask Keith?

 

 **green alien:** ... why would he know?

 

 **not innocent:** well for one, the message was supposed to be sent to Keith 

 

 **loverboy lance:**   gASP

 

 **loverboy lance:** kEITH

 

 **loverboy lance:** WHERE U AT

 

 **loverboy lance:** KEITH KOGANE

 

 **loverboy lance:** KEITH AKIRA KOGANE

 

 **green alien:** whY ISNT HE ANSWERING???? WE NEED ANSWERS

 

 **loverboy lance:** dont worry guys

 

 **loverboy lance:** ya boi lance shall find that shit

 

 **queen allura:** Hurry up!!

 

 **mattchiato:** he's in our dorm last i check

 

 **loverboy lance:** ON IT

 

 

 

 

**mattie >>> shiwo**

 

 

 **mattie:** so

 

 **mattie:** heard from a little birdie you meme

 

 **mattie:** and shitpost

 

 **mattie:** dID U JUST BLOCKED MY NUMBER?

 

**[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]**

 

 **mattie:** sHIRO

 

**[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]**

 

 

 

 

**keith is a kinky boi (10:23 PM)**

 

 

 **queefers:** why are you guys sending Lance in my dorm?

 

 **mattchiato:** cOUGHCOUGH

 

 **queefers:**  ... i'm sorry, i mean me and Matt's dorm.

 

 **mattchiato:** that's better

 

 **green alien:** wHY IS SHIRO MEMEING

 

 **not innocent:** wHY IS HE HIDING IT

 

 **mattchiato:** wHY ISNT HE SHITPOSTING WITH ME

 

 **queefers:** why can't you guys just ask him yourself?

 

 **queen allura:** He blocked us

 

 **queefers:** ... all of you?

 

 **not innocent:** even me :'(

 

 **queefers:** ... he sure got dedication to keep it a secret.

 

 **queefers:** okay so 

 

 **mattchiato:** i KNEW IT

 

 **green alien:** he??? hasnt said??? anything???

 

 **mattchiato:** lmao i was typing it to send it AFTER he explain

 

 **mattchiato:** but i got too excited so when i see the him send a text i immediately press send 

 

 **loverboy lance:** well calm ur shit we want answers

 

 **queefers:** okay chill.

 

 **queefers:** Shiro's a hypocrite bitch.

 

 **queefers:** he called you both as a person in denial

 

 **queefers:** (which is true so stop denying it)

 

 **queefers:** but he is also in a meme phase that he's _very_ not proud of.

 

 **queefers:** he usually just vent it to me but i guess he send it to the wrong person

 

 **queefers:** aka Lance.

 

 **mattchiato:** ok first: i do not hAVE AN ANIME PHASE

 

 **green alien:** U DO SO SUCK IT UP BITCH 

 

 **green alien:** UVE SUCKED DICKS SO SUCKING UP UR PHASE ISNT A BIG PROBLEM

 

 **mattchiato:** but i

 

 **green alien:** NO

 

 **queen allura:** Well that makes sense

 

 **queen allura:** In a way

 

 **queen allura:** I mean, he DID make puns with me

 

 **queen allura:** So I'm not really suprised

 

 **loverboy lance:** wELL IM SHOOKED

 

**loverboy lance _changed_ queefers _name to_ shookeith**

 

 **shookeith:** OF COURSE when my name's changed it's a pun

 

 **shookeith:** again.

 

 **loverboy lance:** shut up we know u love it

 

 **loverboy lance:** also

 

 **loverboy lance:** wAT THE FUCK SHIRO

 

 **loverboy lance:** u HYPOCRITE BITCHHH

 

**shookeith _added_ death take me now _into the chat_**

 

 **death take me now:** betrayal

 

 **shookeith:** shouldn't have taken my ice cream.

 

 **loverboy lance:** so since we know ur tru color does that mean we could meme?

 

 **death take me now:** No.

 

 **not innocent:** I'm not mad, Shiro.

 

 **not innocent:** I'm just disappointed.

 

 **loverboy lance:** OOOHHHH

 

 **green alien:** serVES YOU RIGHT

 

 **green alien:** HOW DARE U KEEP SUCH INFORMATION FROM US

 

 **queen allura:** In which Shiro got burn by his own words

 

 **mattchiato:** NOW WE CAN BE SHITPOSTER BUDDIES

 

 **shookeith:** lmao

 

 **death take me now:** I hate you guys.

 

 **shookeith:** hate you too.

 

 **mattchiato:** <3

 

 **not innocent:** i shall live up to my name :)

 

 **green alien:** bUT DAD

 

 **loverboy lance:** unadopted TWICE

 

 **shookeith:** not suprised there.

 

 **not innocent:** dID KEITH JUST MAKE A JOKE???

 

 **queen allura:** Today sure is full of suprises

 

 **green alien:** broganes exposed lmfao

 

 

 **death take me now:** Goodbye.

 

 

 

 

**sunshine >>> my heart and soul**

 

 

 **sunshine:** bro,,,

 

 **sunshine:** youre staying at their dorm, right??

 

 **my heart and soul:** yea??

 

 **my heart and soul:** there's a fucking rainstorm outside???

 

 **my heart and soul:** i dont want to fuckin die

 

 **sunshine:** oh good

 

 **sunshine:** i thought youre gonna brave the weather or smth

 

 **my heart and soul:** Hunk, me and Keith are buddies now

 

 **my heart and soul:** dont worry about it, im gonna crash at their couch

 

 **sunshine:** good :)

 

 **sunshine:** im very happy u guys are great friends now

 

 **sunshine:** and that you finally let go of that "rivalry" of yours

 

 **my heart and soul:** tHERE WAS A RIVALRY SHUT UP

 

 **sunshine:** stop being in denial Lance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is still platonic,,, even tho Keith is already pining lmao.  
> also it's pride month w00t


	5. anime and ice creams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **mattherine:** holy cytoplasm  
>  
> 
>  **mattherine:** i  _am_ a weeb!!!!
> 
>  
> 
> all according to the keikaku

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some sprinkles of subtle pining here and there  
> and Voltron S6 Trailer killed me cuz LANCE IS A FURRY IS CANON!!! but Keith and Lance interaction :'( totally in character but no sweet reunion?? when will they talked about Naxzela??? ugh anyway enjoy

**mattherine >>> pidgethew**

 

 **mattherine:** pidgey, my sweet younger sibling of mine

 

 **mattherine:** my fave sibling

 

 **mattherine:** i know ur fucking awake, answer me u lil shit

 

 **pidgethew:** what in tarnation

 

 **mattherine:** stop being Keith

 

 **pidgethew:** fuck off

 

 **pidgethew:** and answer the fucking question, Mattherine

 

 **mattherine:** ok ok so

 

 **mattherine:** so

 

 **mattherine:** so

 

 **pidgethew:** jfc Matt i dont hv time for this shit

 

 **pidgethew:** tell me or im blocking u

 

 **mattherine:** alyt geeze

 

 **mattherine:** am i really a weeb?

 

 **pidgethew:** i

 

 **pidgethew:** u texted me

 

 **pidgethew:** at 2 AM

 

 **pidgethew:**  because you wanted to know if youre a weeb? _????_

 

 **mattherine:** yes Pidge,,,

 

 **mattherine:** so am i?

 

 **pidgethew:** cant u ask someone else???

 

 **mattherine:** i asked Keith but he kicked me out of his room :(

 

 **pidgethew:** well shit

 

 **mattherine:** so????

 

 **pidgethew:** yes u are

 

 **pidgethew:** ur a fucking weeb so suck it up buttercup

 

 **mattherine:** but why????

 

 **pidgethew:** sigh

 

 **pidgethew:** the signs of being addicted to anime and turns into a weeb

 

 **pidgethew:**  there

 

 **pidgethew:** thats the fucking link

 

 **pidgethew:** now check

 

 **mattherine:** okey dokey

 

 **mattherine:** holy cytoplasm

 

 **mattherine:** i am a weeb!!!!

 

 **pidgethew:** great! how much did u get?

 

 **mattherine:** 25/25

 

**mattherine:** _[ image ]_

 

 **pidgethew:** okay i did not expect u to know all of it wow

 

 **mattherine:** oH MY GOD

 

 **mattherine:** PIDGE DO NOT TELL ANYONE ABOUT THIS

 

 **mattherine:** ANYONE

 

 **pidgethew:** go

 

 **pidgethew:** be gay

 

 **pidgethew:** and leave me alone

 

 **mattherine:** <3

 

 

 

 

**keith is a kinky boi ( 11:45 AM )**

 

 

**green alien:** _[ image ]_

 

 **green alien:** [ image ]

 

 **green alien:** [ image ]

 

 **death take me now:** I KNEW IT.

 

 **mattchiato:** PIDGE

 

 **not innocent:** top 10 anime betrayal

 

 **mattchiato:** never have a betrayal felt so raw

 

 **loverboy lance:** well it's about time you find out

 

 **mattchiato:** but i dont??? get it??

 

 **mattchiato:** how did u guys find out?

 

 **death take me now:**  You sang 60 song of the opening and closing of Naruto.

 

 **death take me now:** And you remember all the lyrics.

 

 **loverboy lance:** you called me an uncultured swine because i forgot Hiro's number from Darling in the Franxx

 

 **shookeith:** he's not wrong at the uncultured swine part.

 

 **loverboy lance:** >:0

 

 **n** **ot innocent:** you called Keith Inuyasha once

 

 **shookeith:** you forced me to cosplay as Yuu for your Mika from Seraph of the End.

 

 **green alien:** u were very excited to meet Coran but was disappointed bcuz he doesnt look like Conan Edogawa

 

 **mattchiato:** ahh okay then

 

 **mattchiato:** wheres our queen?

 

 **loverboy lance:** u mean Queen B our beautiful Queen?

 

 **death take me now:** Let's avoid this argument again.

 

 **queen allura:** I, like the good girl I am

 

 **green alien:** coughcough sure jan

 

 **queen allura:** ignoring Pidge

 

 **queen allura:** imomw to my test so wish me luck bois

 

 **green alien:** /raises eyebrow/

 

 **queen allura:** Pidge, I know youre a boy rn

 

 **green alien:** dangit

 

 **loverboy lance:** good luck boo

 

 **queen allura:** Thnks bby

 

 **not innocent:** yea what he said, good luck 'Lura, i'll bring u cookies later

 

 **queen allura:** UwU

 

 **queen allura:** I stan one (1) man

 

 **loverboy lance:** excuse me

 

 **queen allura:** I know what I said

 

 **mattch** **iato:** GOOD LUCK BOI

 

 **queen allura: <**3

 

 **shookeith:** you can do it.

 

 **death take me now:** I'm sure you will pass it :)

 

 **queen allura:** Thnks Keith, Dad!!

 

 **death take me now:** sigh

 

 

 

 

**keith is a kinky boi ( 06:12 PM )**

 

 

 **loverboy lance:** since our beautiful Allura pass her test with floating colors

 

 **green alien:** its with flying colors u ignorant slut

 

 **loverboy lance:** IN THIS HOUSE

 

 **loverboy lance:** THERE WILL BE NO SHAMING IN EVERYTHING

 

 **loverboy lance:** OTHER THAN KINKSHAMING

 

 **queen allura:** I, for one, agree on that 100%

 

 **mattchiato:** get to the point Lance,,,,

 

 **mattchiato:** im fucking hungry

 

 **death take me now:** Who is Hungry and why are you fucking them?

 

 **mattchiato:** i

 

 **shookeith:** who named their child Hungry?

 

 **green alien:** the parents of the dude who's fucking Matt apparently

 

 **loverboy lance:** u hv a bad taste in name, Matt

 

 **mattchiato:** if i had a bad taste in name

 

 **mattchiato:** which i dont so dont be a hater

 

 **mattchiato:** u hv a bad taste too

 

 **loverboy lance:** wat

 

 **mattchiato:** wat

 

 **green alien:** i mean u guys are similar in most taste

 

 **queen allura:** GET TO THE POINT LANCE

 

 **loverboy lance:** ok ok simmer down cherry bomb

 

**loverboy lance _changed_ queen allura's  _name to_ cherry bomb**

 

 **loverboy lance:** Hunk invited everyone to come and eat breakfast tomorrow

 

 **cherry bomb:** But?? I'm the only one who pass the test??

 

 **loverboy lance:** Hunk says everyone so it's everyone

 

 **green alien:** what food

 

 **loverboy lance:** not sure yet

 

 **loverboy lance:** he says he will make ice creams thats for sure

 

 **shookeith** : well count me in

 

 **death take me now:** Keith

 

 **shookeith:** Shiro

 

 **death take me now:** Akira

 

 **shookeith:** Takashi

 

 **green alien:** ?? why are they saying Japanese names??

 

 **loverboy lance:** drama DUM DUM DUMMM

 

 **death take me now:** sigh

 

 **death take me now:** Drink it at least ok?

 

 **shookeith:** yeah yeah.

 

 **shookeith:** so i'm in.

 

 **cherry bomb:** This party starts by me so ofc I'm in

 

 **mattchiato:** as seeing that im a shit cook, im in

 

 **green alien:**   freeloader

 

 **mattchiato:** takes one to know one

 

 **death take me now:** I'll join too

 

 **death take me now:** I miss ice cream

 

 **green alien:** cant join

 

 **loverboy lance:** wHAt

 

 **cherry bomb:** Why????

 

 **green alien:** im lactose intolerant

 

 **shookeith:** huh me too.

 

 **death take me now:** sigh

 

 **loverboy lance:** KEITH?????

 

 **loverboy lance:** nope ure not eating the ice cream

 

 **mattchiato:** then can i hv his?

 

 **cherry bomb:** Obviously it goes to the one who pass the test

 

 **cherry bomb:** AKA me

 

 **shookeith:** when you all find out Pidge is lactose intolerant you all ask why,

 

 **shookeith:** when you all find out I'm lactose intolerant you all wanted my ice cream.

 

 **death take me now:** So can I take it?

 

 **shookeith:** um no.

 

 **shookeith:** u promised me ice cream so i'm getting it.

 

 **loverboy lance:** no u dont

 

 **shookeith:** yes.

 

 **loverboy lance:** no

 

 **shookeith:** yes

 

 **loverboy lance:** no

 

 **not innocent:** BEFORE A FIGHT STARTS AGAIN

 

 **not innocent:** i'll make waffles ok???

 

 **not innocent:** you like waffles, dont you, Keith?

 

 **shookeith:** more than life itself.

 

 **not innocent:** THEN IT SETTLED!

 

 **not innocent:** TOMORROW MORNING

 

 **not innocent:** aka tuesday

 

 **not innocent:** WE'LL EAT AT OUR DORM

 

 **green alien:** but

 

 **not innocent:** but nothing

 

 **shookeith:** but i still want ice cream.

 

 **not innocent:** you'll get some if you drink your pills

 

 **mattchiato:** damn ur such a mom fren

 

**loverboy lance _changed_ not innocent's _name to_ mom friend**

 

 **mom friend:** well shit i heart you guys too

 

 **loverboy lance:** we love u too mommy uwu

 

 **death take me now:** Mommy?

 

 **cherry bomb:** Kinky

 

 **mom friend:** no

 

 **cherry bomb:**  :(

 

 **green alien:** does that mean Hunk and Shiro are married?

 

 **death take me now:** No.

 

 **mom friend:** no offense Shiro but no

 

 **death take me now:** None taken.

 

 **green alien:** /raises eyebrow/ suspicious

 

 **shookeith:** why are you guys like this.

 

 **loverboy lance:** u love us UwU

 

 **shookeith:** sigh

 

 **mattchiato:** we love u too Keith UwU

 

 **shookeith:** stop that.

 

 **cherry bomb:** ?? The love?

 

 **shookeith:** no the uwu thing.

 

**mattchiato _changed_ keith is a kinky boi _to_ UWU**

 

 **shookeith:** i hate all yall motherfuckers.

 

 **death take me now:** <3

 

 

 

**mattherine >>> pidgethew**

 

 

 **mattherine:** can i crash today?

 

 **pidgethew:** why

 

 **matherine:** Keith locked me out of the dorm :(

 

 **pidgethew:** wait

 

 

 

 

**tide podge >>> the golden trio**

 

 

 **tide podge:** _[ image ]_

 

 **tide podge:** should i let him in?

 

 **hunkuna matata:** Pidge, we're literally one room away

 

 **tide podge:** then why did we create this gc in the first place huh?

 

 **LEGendary:** he got you there bruh

 

 **LEGendary:** bring 7 instant noodle and it's a deal

 

 **hunkuna matata:** why 7?

 

 **LEGendary:** 2 for each of us and 1 for him

 

 **tide podge:** lmao alyt

 

 

 

 

**pudge >>> mutt**

 

 

 **pudge:** bring us 4 instant noodles then it's a yes

 

 **mutt:** on it

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's short and i hate it ugh  
> also i put a reference of my old fave cartoon show ;))))


	6. bonding moment 101

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a guide in how to have a bonding moment steps by yours truly.

**UWU ( 09:23 AM )**

 

 

 **cherry bomb:** First of all, thank you for the food, Hunk

 

 **cherry bomb:** It was delicious and I want more

 

 **loverboy lance:** well he's mineso fuck off u british

 

 **green alien:** ehem

 

 **loverboy lance:** ***ours

 

 **green alien:** continue on

 

 **mattchiato:** marry me Hunk

 

 **mattchiato:** together we're unstoppable

 

 **loverboy lance:** i sAID HE IS OURS THANK YOU

 

 **shookeith:** i get why he's your favorite, Allura.

 

 **shookeith:** he's a god.

 

 **mom friend:** awww you guys are just overreacting

 

 **death take me now:** Your cooking cured my depression.

 

 **loverboy lance:** OMGEEE

 

 **shookeith:** am i the only one reading Lance's scream as one of the dumb blonde popular girl squeal?

 

 **green alien:** nah fam

 

 **green alien:** me too

 

 **mattchiato:** dO NOT MOKE MY SON HE IS PRECIOUS

 

 **green alien:** moke

 

 **cherry bomb:** moke

 

 **shookeith:** moke

 

 **loverboy lance:** moke

 

 **mattchiato:** TRAITOR

 

 **mattchiato:** i was saving ur ass and this is what i get

 

 **mom friend:** lol what ass

 

 **shookeith:** Lance's fucking flat.

 

 **loverboy lance:** HUnK????

 

 **mattchiato:** serves u right bitch

 

 **loverboy lance:** aNYWAY IGNORING HUNK'S BETRAYAL

 

 **cherry bomb:** How dare you ignore Hunk, he did nothing wrong

 

 **loverboy lance:** fuck off u brit

 

 **loverboy lance:** HUNK'S COOKING MAKES SHIRO MEME!!!

 

 **green alien:** wait wat

 

 **green alien:** HWAT

 

 **green alien:** HE MEMES

 

 **mattchiato:** SHIRO, MY SHITPOSTER BRO

 

 **death take me now:** This is why I never meme here.

 

 

 

 

**kogayne >>> takashit**

 

 

 **kogayne:** it's Matt

 

 **takashit:** What did he do this time?

 

 **kogayne:** wha

 

 **kogayne:** i mean it's me, Matt

 

 **kogayne:** ya boi

 

 **takashit:** What did you do this time?

 

 **kogayne:** IT'S NOT ME THIS TIME OK

 

 **kogayne:** Keith's puking at the dorm

 

 **kogayne:** help

 

 **kogayne:** he puked at my shirt ;-;

 

 **takashit:** I'm on it.

 

 

 

 

**UWU ( 03:43 PM )**

 

 

 **death take me now:** Okay who gives Keith the ice cream.

 

 **green alien:** where's the question mark, dad?

 

 **death take me now:** It's not a question.

 

 **death take me now:** It's a statement.

 

 **death take me now:** Now confess, who did it.

 

 **mom friend:** is he okay???

 

 **mattchiato:** aside from puking and headache, yeah he is.

 

 **loverboy lance:** HWAT

 

 **loverboy lance:** HE TOLD ME HE DRANK HIS MEDS

 

 **death take me now:** Lance.

 

 **death take me now:** You're going to take care of him.

 

 **death take me now:** And wash his puke.

 

 **death take me now:** That's your punishment.

 

 **loverboy lance:** but he

 

 **loverboy lance:** i didnt even

 

 **death take me now:** Lance.

 

 **loverboy lance:** yes dad

 

 **mattchiato:** ok, tell me when you're here dude

 

 **loverboy lance:** yea yea

 

 **mom friend:** im gonna cook for him

 

 **loverboy lance:** wat bout me homie?

 

 **mom friend:** haha suffer your punishent

 

 **loverboy lance:** :'0

 

 **mom friend:** lol jk, i'll cook some for u too

 

 **loverboy lance:** <3

 

 **loverboy lance:** wait wat about my class?

 

 **loverboy lance:** and Keith's??

 

 **green alien:** dw Lance, i'll copy the notes for you

 

 **mattchiato:** i'll ask one of his friend for the notes.

 

 **loverboy lance:** thanks man

 

 **green alien:** ey

 

 **loverboy lance:**  thanks dude

 

 **green alien:** good enough

 

 **cherry bomb:** I love our family :')

 

 

 

 

**lans >>> mattdew**

 

 

 **lans:**  oh rapunzel,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

 

 **lans:**  let down your hair

 

 **mattdew:** elsa makes more sense dude

 

 **lans:** just open the goddamn door

 

 **mattdew:** cLOSING THE GODDAMN DOOR NO

 

 **lans:** get dat shit away from me

 

 **mattdew:** IT'S MUCH BETTER TO FACE THIS KIND OF THINGS

 

 **mattdew:** AHA I HEARD U MUMBLING BITCH

 

 **lans:** fUCK

 

 **mattdew:** i knEW IT BLACKMAIL MATERIAL

 

 **lans:** fuCK YOU

 

 

 

 

**UWU ( 05:32 PM )**

 

 

 **death take me now:** Lance, update.

 

 **death take me now:** Lance?

 

 **cherry bomb:** He's dead

 

 **death take me now:** Lance???

 

 **death take me now:** Where is he?

 

 **green alien:** he's not at class, Shiro

 

 **mom friend:** not at our dorm too

 

 **death take me now:** Okay, that's it, I'll go and check.

 

 **mattchiato:** OH MY GODD

 

 **death take me now:**?

 

 **mattchiato:** im at me and Keith's dorm 

 

 **cherry bomb:** What's wrong??

 

 **green alien:** ure scaring Shiro lol

 

 **mom friend:** YOU'RE SCARING ME TOO TELL US

 

 **mattchiato:**   _[ image ]_

 

 **cherry bomb:** HWAT

 

 **cherry bomb:**  This is so fucking cute I'm sCREENSHOTING

 

 **death take me now:** Oh thank god.

 

 **green alien:** thats gay over there

 

 **mom friend:** i,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

 

 **mom friend:** UWU SO SOFT AHHH

 

 **mom friend:** SCREENSHOT

 

 **green alien:** same

 

 **green alien:** but for blackmailing purpose ofc

 

 **death take me now:** Sounds fake but okay.

 

 **mom friend:** DAD STRIKES AGAIN

 

 **green alien:** fuck u

 

 

 

 

**UWU ( 11:23 AM )**

 

 

 **shookeith:** wE HAD A BONDING MOMENT

 

 **shookeith:** YOU CRADLED ME IN YOUR ARMS

 

 **loverboy lance:** nOPE

 

 **loverboy lance:** dont remember

 

 **loverboy lance:** diDNT HAPPEN

 

 **mom friend:** what are u guys fighting about again???

 

 **shookeith:** wE HAD A BONDING MOMENT

 

 **loverboy lance:** it diDNT HAPPEN

 

 **green alien:** u know shit's real when Keith didnt use any full stop to end his sentence

 

 **cherry bomb:** what are you guys EVEN fighting about?

 

 **shookeith:** we're not fighting.

 

 **shookeith:** we're having creative discussion.

 

 **loverboy lance:** FIGHTING

 

 **shookeith:** CREATIVE DISCUSSION

 

 **loverboy lance:** FIGHTING

 

 **shookeith:** CREATIVE DISCUSSION

 

 **loverboy lance:** FIGHTING

 

 **shookeith:** CREATIVE DISCUSSION

 

 **death take me now:** I can't believe you guys are fighting about whether you're having a fight or a creative discussion.

 

 **mattchiato:** ok so since i saw this all happen LIVE

 

 **mattchiato:** i shall tell u lot

 

 **green alien:** just say it

 

 **mattchiato:** Keith and Lance fell asleep 

 

 **mattchiato:** with Lance's arm draped on his body yes?

 

 **green alien:** yes yes we see the picture just continue

 

 **death take me now:** patience yields focus, Pidge.

 

 **mattchiato:** yea listen to dad 

 

 **death take me now:** Matt.

 

 **mattchiato:** whoops sorry dad

 

 **death take me now:** Just continue.

 

 **mattchiato:** ok so

 

 **mattchiato:** apparently they talk abt some deep shit??

 

 **mattchiato:** but the next day Lance doesnt remember so

 

 **cherry bomb:** That's rather uneventful

 

 **cherry bomb:** Where is Keith anyway?

 

 **mom friend:** banging Lance's door

 

 **cherry bomb:** Well tell him to go to the cafe

 

 **cherry bomb:** Or he wont get his coffee

 

 **mom friend:** update Keith just runs out the dorm without saying goodbye or sorry

 

 **green alien:** rude

 

 **mattchiato:** i want coffee too

 

 **death take me now:** Me too.

 

 **cherry bomb:** Well get your arses here

 

 **green alien:** lol arses

 

 

 

 

**hunkuna matata >>> the golden trio**

 

 

 **hunkuna matata:** u remember it didnt u

 

 **hunkuna matata:** notice how i didnt use a question mark

 

 **LEGendary:**... yea

 

 **tide podge:** dude why u lyin there

 

 **LEGendary:** im not emotionally ready for that

 

 **hunkuna matata:** what? bonding?

 

 **LEGendary:** YES

 

 **LEGendary:** like ive just been frens with him for awhile???

 

 **tide podge:** actually uve been friends with him since we're freshmans but youre blinded with your "rivalry"

 

 **LEGendary:** stoP USING QUOTATION MARK, THERE IS ONE YOU GREMLIN

 

 **LEGendary:** but i just really being friends with him this few weeks and

 

 **LEGendary:** we're talking about stuff???

 

 **LEGendary:** whatever im not emotionally ready for this.

 

 **green alien:** iM nOt eMoTiOnaLLy rEaDY fOR tHiS

 

 **hunkuna matata:**... i dont get why but i support u bro

 

 **LEGendary:** bro <3 

 

 **LEGendary:** true friendship, be like him Pidge

 

 **green alien:** no one can be like Hunk

 

 **LEGendary:** shit u rite

 

 

 

 

 

**arulla >>> kissu**

 

**arulla:** You doing okay?

 

 **kissu:**  yes.

 

 **arulla:** I know that you feel rejected, Keith

 

 **kissu:**...

 

 **arulla:** Look, I have no idea what's inside Lance's head but I know he means well

 

 **arulla:** Maybe he's not ready to face the fact that you guys are really friends now

 

 **arulla:** Lance always runs from his problems and create bigger one to ignore it

 

 **kissu:**... how do you know him so well?

 

 **arulla:** He's my?? Cousin??

 

 **kissu:** wait wat

 

 **arulla:** wat

 

 **arulla:** Want me to go to your dorm? We can watch Netflix

 

 **kissu:** sure, Matt wants to join too though.

 

 **arulla:** The more the merrier

 

 **kissu:** thnks 'Lur

 

 **arulla:** Np 'Kira

 

 **arulla:** Also open your door, I'm outside

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm finally free!!! also posting again because I got inspired yet again!
> 
> Keith and Allura's friendship are soft thank you.
> 
> Shiro is busy that's why I write Allura as the one who comforts him.
> 
> kudos and comments are deeply appreciated, I love all your comments :)


	7. element of suprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **loverboy lance:** im noT A DISASTER EXCUSE ME  
>    **  
> **  
>  **loverboy lance:** i aM A GREAT GUY  
>    **  
> **  
>  **loverboy lance:** MAMA AINT RAISE NO DISASTER  
>  **  
> **  
>  **shookeith:**  but she sure raise a drama queen.  
>   **  
> **  
>  **loverboy lance:** FUCK OFF

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for the 100+ kudos and 1000+ hits!!
> 
> i think allurance will be canon with how much they're pushing their relationship and friendship /sigh/ i hope not tho theyre my brotp ( but my ultimate brotp is hance / broganes lol)
> 
> get ready for season 6 guys, prepare tissues

**UWU ( 02:12 PM )**

 

  
  
**cherry bomb:** After 1 whole week of tests

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  We are finally free, people  
 

  
**loverboy lance:**  preach

  
   
**mattchiato:**  amen brother

  
   
**death take me now:** It was fun while it lasted.

  
   
**death take me now:** I truly enjoy your sufferings and screaming.

  
   
**shookeith:** yea well you're checking the papers now so,  
 

  
**mom friend:**  it's October guys!!!

  
   
**mom friend:** you know what that means

  
   
**green alien _changed_  UWU  _to_  haloweed **  
 

  
**mom friend:**  eh good enough   
 

  
**cherry bomb:**  LET'S DRESS FOR HALOWEEN

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  YES

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  let's do it

  
   
**death take me now:**  And that's my sign to leave the conversation.

  
   
**mattchiato:**  SHIRO WAIT

  
   
**mattchiato:**  SHIROOOO

  
   
**mattchiato:** dont u leave me, bae

  
   
**shookeith:** fuck no.  
 

  
**shookeith:** i've had enough of that last two years with Matt.

  
   
**green alien:**  bUT CRYPTIDS

  
   
**shookeith:**  i'm sorry but no.

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  anyoNE WHO JOINS WILL GET COOKIES FROM HUNK

  
   
**mom friend:**  wait wat

 

 **loverboy lance:** drasastic calls always leads to drasastic measures, Hunk

 

 **mom friend:** that is not how the phrase goes

  
   
**death take me now:**  Turns out my schedule is free.

  
   
**death take me now:** Well whaddya know.

  
   
**death take me now:**  Guess I'll be joining you guys :)

  
   
**mattchiato:**  bitch

  
   
**green alien:** k-keef senpai? 

  
   
**green alien:**  w-will you join us UwU ?

  
   
**shookeith:**  no.

  
   
**green alien:** ÒwÓ _n_ ani???

  
   
**shookeith:**  no.

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  wHAT DID U SAY U PUNK

  
   
**shookeith:**  i said no, shitbag.

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  THIS JUST IN, FOLKS, A HOMOSEXUAL MAN WITH INITIAL KAK HAS TURNED DOWN AN OFFER  
 

  
**loverboy lance:**  aN OFFER THAT IS HUNK'S COOKING, YES, THAT BLESSING 

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  "IS HE A WEIRDO?" HE SURE IS JARED

  
   
**green alien:**  wow  
 

  
**green alien:**  turning down Hunk's food

  
   
**green alien:** such anignorant slut

  
   
**mattchiato:**  IN THIS HOUSE

  
   
**mattchiato:** THERE WILL BE NO SLUT SHAMING OR ANY KIND OF SHAMING EXCEPT FOR KINKSHAMING CUZ SOME PPL LIKE THAT

  
   
**death take me now:**  Is Haloween last two year with Matt that bad?

  
   
**green alien:** lol that rhymed  
 

  
**shookeith:** it's the worst.  
 

  
**shookeith:** very very very VERY BAD.

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  drama queen

  
   
**shookeith:** attention whore.

  
   
**loverboy lance:** gASP  
 

  
**loverboy lance:**  the audacity

  
   
**green alien:**  oH HOW THE TURN TABLES  
 

  
**shookeith:** cry me a table, Lance.

  
   
**death take me now:**  It's cry me a river, Keith.

  
   
**shookeith:** why would i need a river?

  
   
**shookeith:** at least i can use a table.

  
   
**mattchiato:** dudE I SAID I WAS SORRY  
 

  
**shookeith:**  well sorry doesn't sweeten my coffee does it Mattheo?

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  Ok! So I've found the perfect costume for all of us!

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  so so perfect  
 

  
**green alien:**  please be a good one please be a good one please

  
   
**mom friend:** which is ... ?

  
   
**cherry bomb:** VOLTRON

  
   
**green alien:**  tHANK GOSHDARN

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  yes!

  
   
**cherry bomb:** Pretty neat cause it covers most of your personalities :))))

  
   
**cherry bomb:** The leader guy, the black paladin, is Shiro just because

  
   
**death take me now:**  What's a black paladin?  
 

  
**cherry bomb:** Hunk is the yellow paladin because he is loved and a literal sunshine

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  yEs

  
   
**loverboy lance changed mom friend's name to literal sunshine  
 **

 **  
literal sunshine:**  aww you guys im blushing

  
   
**mattchiato:** ur beautiful even when u blush babe

  
**  
loverboy lance:**  for the last time Matt, u cant take Hunk  
 

  
**mattchiato:** awwww worth a shot

  
  **  
cherry bomb:**  Anyway,,,

  
  **  
cherry bomb:**  The green one is Pidge cuz she's smart as hell

  
   
**shookeith:**  and short.  
 

 **  
green alien:**  fight me bitch

  
   
**shookeith:**  what was that? i can't hear you, you're too far down there.  
 

 **  
green alien:**  FIGHT MEH

  
  **  
cherry bomb:**  And since in the story the green paladin's sibling is a rebel, Matt is the rebel   
 

 **  
death take me now:**  Matt alone is a rebel.

  
   
**mattchiato:** uwu yEA BOi

  
  **  
cherry bomb:**  I will be the princess because I said so

  
  **  
cherry bomb:**  Lance will be the blue paladin because he's a flirty bisexual disaster  
 

 **  
loverboy lance:**  im noT A DISASTER EXCUSE ME

  
  **  
loverboy lance:**  i aM A GREAT GUY

  
  **  
loverboy lance:**  MAMA AINT RAISE NO DISASTER

  
   
**shookeith:**  but she sure raise a drama queen.

  
  **  
loverboy lance:**  FUCK OFF

  
  **  
cherry bomb:**  And Keith will be the red paladin because he's hotheaded!

  
  **  
cherry bomb:**  Are we clear????

  
  **  
literal sunshine:**  one (1) problem  
 

 **  
cherry bomb:**  What

  
  **  
death take me now:**  Keith refuses to join the group costume.

  
  **  
loverboy lance:**  cause he's a scaredy cat  
 

  
**shookeith:**  you would be if you know what happened last two years.  
 

  
**mattchiato:**  JESUS FUCKING CHRIST KEITH  
 

  
**mattchiato:**  LET IT GO  
 

  
**shookeith:** _[ image ]_

  
   
**mattchiato:**  now that was just uncalled for  
 

 **  
green alien:** ok what really happen last two years ago???

  
   
**green alien:**  and why is Keith so traumatized about it??

  
   
**shookeith:** we do not talk about that dark times.  
 

  
**mattchiato:**  it was not that bad 

  
   
**shookeith:** bitch.

  
   
**death take me now:**  Settle down, kids.  
 

  
**death take me now:**  Just tell us the story.

  
   
**shookeith:** fuck off, Shiro.

  
   
**death take me now:**  You called me dad and I shall be dad.

  
   
**death take me now:**  Now tell us.

  
   
**mattchiato:**  well u see daddy,,,

  
   
**death take me now:** First of all, no.  
 

  
**death take me now:**  Second of all, I was talking to Keith.  
 

  
**mattchiato:**  :0

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  just?? tell us???  
 

  
**shookeith:** the offer is rudely declined.  
 

  
**shookeith:** it was the most horrific thing i have ever seen in my whole life.  
 

  
**shookeith:** just know that it's bad.

  
   
**shookeith:** very bad.

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  I dont know what happen last two years with you bitches,  
 

  
**cherry bomb:** And I dont fucking care

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  But I know what will change ur mind Keith

  
   
**shookeith:** oh really?

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  Well,,,  
 

  
**cherry bomb:**  The red paladin wields a sword,,,

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  And maybe I get too excited and buy all of the costumes already

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  It sure would be a shame if I were to

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  Oh, I dont know,  
 

  
**cherry bomb:**  Throw it away

  
   
**shookeith:**  wait no.

  
   
**shookeith:**  i'll join.

  
   
**green alien:**  oh so now u join

  
   
**shookeith:** she says the red paladin wields a sword, Pidge.  
 

  
**shookeith:**  swords.

  
   
**loverboy lance:** what's so great about swords??

  
   
**death take me now:**  Lance.

  
   
**death take me now:**  Keith's graduation quote is "while you were being heterosexual I studied the blade".

  
   
**mattchiato:**  ayyyyy tru

  
   
**shookeith:** i'm not even sorry about that.

 

 **green alien:** why

 

 **shookeith:** im gay and i love swords fuck off.

 

 **literal sunshine:**  so it's official guys??

  
   
**cherry bomb:**  Yes

  
   
**cherry bomb:** And dont u dare to say no

  
   
**literal sunshine:**  well alrighty then

 

 

 

**  
  
UWU ( 11:43 AM )**

**  
  
   
death take me now:**  Do I need to know why Lance, Pidge and Hunk are suspended for three days?  
 

 **  
death take me now:**  Actually I want to know.

  
  **  
death take me now:**  I expect more from you, Hunk.

  
  **  
literal sunshine:**  u shouldnt have, Shiro  
 

 **  
loverboy lance:**  for the record, it was Pidge's idea

  
  **  
green alien:**  Lance supplies the stuff  
 

  
**mattchiato:**  and Hunk??

  
  **  
loverboy lance:**  he's the one who mixes it all

  
   
**mattchiato:**  not suprised and totally NOT disappointed  
 

  
**mattchiato:**  great job yall

  
  **  
death take me now:**  Matt, don't encourage them.

  
**  
cherry bomb:**  So

  
  **  
cherry bomb:**  You guys finally got suspended?

  
  **  
cherry bomb:**  Nice, I'm proud to call you my friends **  
**

**  
death take me now:**  Allura, no.

  
**  
cherry bomb:**  Allura, yes

  
   
**shookeith:**  why tho?

  
   
**shookeith:**  like what happen when you mixed it all? 

  
   
**shookeith:**  and why did you even do that in the first place?

  
  **  
literal sunshine:**  why not?  
 

 **  
loverboy lance:**  it explodes and burns the lab's table

 

 **loverboy lance:** and our lab coats too lol  
 

 **  
green alien:**  because we CAN AND WE WILL

  
  **  
green alien:**  we're not cowards like you

  
   
**shookeith:**  you say that, yet this is the first time you guys get suspended  
 

 **  
loverboy lance:**  shit u rite

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  quick Hunk, give a snarky but smart comment

  
   
**literal sunshine:**  this is the first time because we're secretive like a spy

  
   
**shookeith:**  ...

  
   
**shookeith:**  well played

  
   
**mattchiato:**  wat did you guys even use??

  
   
**mattchiato:**  like how does it get on fire???  
 

  
**green alien:**  we use this element called AH

  
   
**loverboy lance:** aka the element of suprise ;)

 

 **literal sunshine:** we close our eyes and just mixes everything lol  
 

  
**death take me now:**  I should've seen this coming miles away.  
 

  
**literal sunshine:**  at least it's only four days

 

 **loverboy lance:** freE TIME AYYYY

 

 

 

  
   
**haloweed ( 01:18 PM )**

 **  
  
   
green alien: ** cant believe im saying this but

  
   
**green alien:**  i miss school ajajjajsxa  
 

  
**mattchiato:**  wow cant relate  
 

  
**loverboy lance:**  where are the others??

  
   
**loverboy lance:**  let's hang out at the cafe like weirdos  


**  
literal sunshine:**  joining  


**  
literal sunshine:**  at least now im not stuck in the dorm

  
   
**green alien:**  me too  
 

  
**mattchiato:** as someone who uses his name as a pun of coffee

 

 **mattchiato:** I SHALL JOIN

  
   
**mattchiato:**  Keith is at his class, Allura is at hers and Shiro is grading the exam papers  
 

  
**mattchiato:**  so YES IM JOINING

  
   
**shookeith:**  me too, wait for me Matt.

  
   
**literal sunshine:**  shouldnt you be in class?

  
   
**shookeith:**  probably, i don't really care.

  
  **  
loverboy lance:**  eh

  
  **  
loverboy lance:**  the more the merrier

  
   
**mattchiato:**  alyt we'll meet at the block  
  **  
  
**

 

 **  
  
death take me now**   _created a Groupchat_

  
  **  
death take me now**   _invited_   **cherry bomb, loverboy lance, literal sunshine, mattchiato, green alien**   _to the Groupchat_  
 

 **  
death take me now**   _named the Groupchat:_ **You know what this is about**

 

**  
   
You know what this is about ( 09:42 AM )  
   
 **

**  
death take me now:** Well?

 

 **death take me now:** What have we got so far?

  
   
**death take me now:** Did he notice anything weird, Matt?

  
   
**mattchiato:**  of course, of course, boss  
 

  
**mattchiato:** i have made sure he doesnt notice any single thing about this

  
   
**death take me now:** Hunk, have you prepared yourself?

  
**  
literal sunshine:** im ready  
 

  
**literal sunshine:**  my kitchen is ready

  
   
**death take me now:** Pidge, the plannings?

  
   
**green alien:** i've created the plans and schedule to keep him occupied 

  
   
**death take me now:** Allura, supplies?

  
   
**cherry bomb:** I've bought everything we need  
 

  
**death take me now:** Lance, the diversion and distractions?

  
   
**loverboy lance:** im sooo gonna be very annoying and nosy dont worry, i promise

  
   
**death take me now:** Good.  
 

  
**death take me now:** I'm glad everyone is taking this seriously.

  
   
**death take me now:** Operation 1023 is a go.

  
   
**death take me now:** And makes sure he doesn't notice anything with everything you got.  
 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what did happen last two years? ;)
> 
> as always kudos and comment!


	8. horror movies always leads to romance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> klance klance klance klance klance klance kLANCE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if it took so long! the real copy got deleted so i have to rewrite again ugh
> 
> also it's my birthday, i shall give you a blessing: SHAY
> 
> shatt and klance are here too i guess
> 
> and ooh a long chapter??

**haloweed (10:12 PM)**

 

 

 **loverboy lance** **:** hey so

 

 **loverboy lance:** i was thinking

 

 **shookeith:** a dangerous event.

 

 **loverboy lance:** hush child

 

 **loverboy lance:** the adult is talking here

 

 **shookeith:** i'm older than you.

 

 **loverboy lance:** with your height? u might as well be a high schooler

 

 **shookeith:** fight me, Lance.

 

 **shookeith:** i fucking dare you.

 

 **loverboy lance:** challenge fucking accepted

 

 **loverboy lance:** meet me at Denny's parking lot, 2 AM

 

 **literal sunshine:** guys please dont fight

 

 **literal sunshine:** Keith, be the bigger person here

 

 **shookeith:** excuse you,

 

 **shookeith:** i'm 5'5" and bitter.

 

 **loverboy lance:** holy shit u rlly are short lmao

 

 **shookeith:** FUCK YOU

 

 **shookeith:** get ready to get your ass kicked.

 

 **loverboy lance:** oh please,,,,

 

 **loverboy lance:** if anything, it would be u who complains about ur sore ass

 

 **shookeith:** wat.

 

 **mattchiato:** /chokes/

 

 **green alien:** the sexual tension is thick in the air

 

 **literal sunshine:** youfuckedup.jpg

 

 **loverboy lance:**  ??? 

 

 **loverboy lance:** wat the hap is fuckening???

 

 **cherry bomb:** Lance, sweetheart,,,,

 

 **cherry bomb:** Re-read what you just typed

 

 **loverboy lance:** ??? ok?

 

 **loverboy lance:** /gASP/

 

 **loverboy lance:** thAT WAS NOT WAT I MEANT

 

 **loverboy lance:** i mEAN WHEN I KICK HIS ASS

 

 **green alien:** that's some kinky shit u said there 

 

 **mattchiato:** damn, Lance, u're an assman?

 

 **loverboy lance:** nOOOO THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT GODDAMN IT

 

 **loverboy lance:** also yes i am lol

 

 **loverboy lance:** i love me thicc globes

 

 **literal sunshine:** not helping your case at all

 

 **death take me now:** Lance.

 

 **loverboy lance:** oh no

 

 **green alien:** the father has arrived

 

 **death take me now:** Saw you talking about wrecking my little brother's ass.

 

 **loverboy lance:** SHIRO IT'S NOT WHAT U THINK

 

 **death take me** **now:** I WON'T HESITATE BITCH.

 

 **death take me now:** I do not approve.

 

 **loverboy lance:** see??

 

 **loverboy lance:** it is impossible for me to fuck Keith

 

 **death take me now:** You have to date him first.

 

 **loverboy lance:** wait wat

 

 **literal sunshine:** are we ignoring the fact Shiro and Lance just pulled a vine?

 

 **death take me now:** And I need to talk about the shovel talk.

 

 **green alien:** dont forget the sex talk

 

 **mattchiato:** also the sock and door thing

 

 **literal sunshine:** guys? are we ignoring it??

 

 **loverboy lance:** foR THE LAST TIME I AM NOT FUCKING KEITH

 

 **green alien:** yet

 

 **loverboy lance:** i juST WANT TO FIGHT HIM

 

 **shookeith:** that's kinky, Lance.

 

 **loverboy lance:** yoU ARE NOT HELPING

 

 **literal sunshine:** okay then, so we're ignoring it

 

 **death take me now:** I don't care about what you guys do during foreplay, Lance.

 

 **loverboy lance:** seriOUSLY

 

 **loverboy lance:** unfortunately, my good friends, my one and only true love remains myself

 

 **cherry bomb:** At least you dont have to worry about rejection, Lance

 

 **loverboy lance:** not necessarily

 

 **loverboy lance:** i turn myself down occasionally, to keep things interesting ;)

 

 **literal sunshine:** taking narcissism to the next level

 

 **death take me now:** The point is, don't fight at the parking lot.

 

 **death take me now:** It's just been a week back from your punishment.

 

 **green alien:** psh more like freedom

 

 **mattchiato:** those three days of your so called "freedom" are filled with you groaning and screaming

 

 **green alien:** listen,,,,,,

 

 **green alien:** i can expLAIN

 

 **cherry bomb:** No you cant

 

 **green alien:** no i cant

 

 **death take me now:** Guys.

 

 **death take me now:** Please sleep.

 

 **mattchiato:** ok son

 

 **death take me now:** I'm older than you.

 

 **mattchiato:** whoops sorry dad

 

 **death take me now:** No.

 

 

 

 

**haloweed (09:11 AM)**

 

 

 **loverboy lance:** wAIT I FORGOT TO TELL YOU GUYS

 

 **shookeith:** about??

 

 **literal sunshine:** you havent told them???

 

 **cherry bomb:** Told us what?

 

 **literal sunshine:** we're having a small party!

 

 **mattchiato:** sOUNDS GAY IM IN

 

 **green alien:** there is literally nothing gay about that sentence

 

 **mattchiato:** noT YET LMAO

 

 **death take me now:** He just woke up.

 

 **cherry bomb:** On the scale from 1 to 10 how sleepy are you, Matt?

 

 **mattchiato:** 420

 

 **literal sunshine:** that's too high

 

 **mattchiato:** you fucking know it

 

 **green alien:** how did u know Matt just wakes up, Shiro?

 

 **death take me now:** He crashes at my place yesterday

 

 **shookeith:** i kicked him out again.

 

 **loverboy lance:** why

 

 **shookeith:** he was smoking weed in the living room.

 

 **loverboy lance:** understandable have a nice day

 

 **loverboy lance:** so anyone wanna join?

 

 **loverboy lance:** it'll be just us dont worry

 

 **loverboy lance:** looking at u Keith

 

 **shookeith:** it's not my fault i hate people.

 

 **literal sunshine:** but you haven't meet all of them, there are some nice people!

 

 **shookeith:** i've met enough of them.

 

 **shookeith:** what a bunch of bastards.

 

 **shookeith:** looking at you, Lance.

 

 **loverboy lance:** fuck u

 

 **green alien:** actually we're inviting one more person,,,,

 

 **shookeith:**... name?

 

 **green alien:** Shay?

 

 **shookeith:** ok i'm joining.

 

 **literal sunshine:** really?

 

 **shookeith:**? yea? 

 

 **shookeith:** she is nice.

 

 **cherry bomb:** Me too! I miss her!

 

 **mattchiato:** ayy we're meeting who?

 

 **death take me now:** I'll join for the free food and meeting Shay again.

 

 **literal sunshine:** How did you guys even know her?

 

 **shookeith:** same class.

 

 **cherry bomb:** My father introduced her to me.

 

 **death take me now:** I teach her class.

 

 **mattchiato:** i have no frickle idea who ur talking abt but im still joining

 

 **loverboy lance:** great!

 

 **loverboy lance:** so it settled then?

 

 **cherry bomb:** Ohohoho, no.

 

 **cherry bomb:** The question is: why are you inviting her? ',:)

 

 

 **shookeith:** i swear to god if yo're inviting that angel just to flirt with her, Lance ...

 

 **loverboy lance:** iM NOT, JESUS, CALM UR ASS

 

 **loverboy lance:** well not rlly like that

 

 **cherry bomb:** Keith, bring my wooden katana

 

 **cherry bomb:** Lance needs to be punished

 

 **mattchiato:** kinky shit mmmMmMMM

 

 **shookeith:** on it.

 

 **loverboy lance:** iTS NOT LIKE THAT

 

 **death take me now:** Guys, stop, let Lance explains.

 

 **loverboy lance:** thank you

 

 **death take me now:** Then you could kick his ass.

 

 **loverboy lance:** ouch, harsh

 

 **green alien:** we invited her cuz Hunk has a crush on her lol

 

 **literal sunshine:** PIDGE

 

 **literal sunshine:** where the frickle frackle is the subtlety you promised me

 

 **green alien:** gone with Lance's dignity yesterday

 

 **loverboy lance:** HEY

 

 **shookeith:** i approve, Hunk marry her now.

 

 **cherry bomb:** Agreed, you guys would make a great couple :)

 

 **death take me now:** What they both says.

 

 **mattchiato:** still have no idea who u talkin abt 

 

 **literal sunshine:** aww thanks guys, but she doesnt like me like that

 

 **green alien:** /looks into the camera like The Office/

 

 **literal sunshine:**?

 

 **loverboy lance:** Hunk is so oblivious that he doesnt see tht his crush likes him too

 

 **literal sunshine:** she doesnt!

 

 **green alien:** just yesterday she said that you're a boyfriend material!

 

 **literal sunshine:** yeah, as a fren!!!

 

 **cherry bomb:** Woah okay.

 

 **shookeith:** he really  _is_ oblivious

 

 **death take me now:** Hunk is the most oblivious person i know.

 

 **mattchiato:** sure jan 

 

 **death take me now:**?

 

 **mattchiato:** nothing

 

 **literal sunshine:** ANYWAY

 

 **literal sunshine:** it'll be at 6 and im cooking 

 

 **mattchiato:** aight mate

 

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

Hunk is nervous.

 

Pidge could tell with how much food he had cook ( "Hunk, we don't need this much," "But what if we run out of food?" ), his pacing ( "Stop it, Hunk, you'll burn the carpet with how much you're pacing" "Well shit, Lance, my crush is about to come here and it  _has_ to be perfect!" ), and also the fact that he's sweating and is groaning on the couch.

 

Their living room is huge, with a big, long and not to mention comfy couch that could fit at least four people, three bean bags; each with different colors - blue, green and yellow - which could fit 2 people and a  _very_ clean floor ( "It's not clean enough!" "HUNK!" ) that is covered with a navy blue carpet. The carpet is filled with lots of video games and movie discs neatly stacked next to each other. The foods are at the kitchen, ready to be eaten, while the trio are sitting at the couch, Hunk in the middle with Lance leaning on his left side, his head on Hunk's shoulder, probably playing with his phone. Pidge is on his right side, putting both of her hands behind her head, legs dangling at the edge of the couch, all the while trying to calm Hunk down.

 

"But what if Shay gets in the wrong dorm?"

 

"Shay knows exactly where our dorm is, Hunk,"

 

"What if she forgets?" Hunk is panicking again.

 

"Then she could text us for the dorm number," she replied easily.

 

Hunk counted the seats and let out a horrified gasp, "What if the seats are not enough?" 

 

Pidge is too tired for this shit. "Then some of us will sit on the floor," Really the only reason she's doing this is because she loves Hunk too much.

 

"What if the popcorns aren't enough?" Hunk questioned again.

 

"Hunk," she started, "you've make ten bowls full of popcorns," at Hunk's panicked stare she continued, "Hunk, there are only seven of us,"

 

"Hunkadory, sweetie, my stars and everything," Lance turns his body, facing them, smile in reassurance, "it'll be fine!" 

 

Hunk looks unconvinced.

 

"Look," Lance wraps his arm over Hunk's shoulder, "you've prepared everything! Food," his other hand points towards the kitchen, "Entertainment," pointing to the stacked things on the floor, "And everything!" he smiles.

 

Suprisingly, Hunk looks calmer now, and he lets out a laugh, "Okay, you're right,"

 

"Now," Lance smirks, "let's pick the best blanket and hog it before the others came,"

 

Three things happen right then.

 

One, Hunk stands up so quickly that Lance falls out of the couch with a _"Hey!"_ as Hunk runs to somewhere, screaming, "I forgot the blankets!", leaving dust at their wake. Lance and Pidge stared at each other before looking at where Hunk went running.

 

Two, there was a knocking sound from the door, but is ignored and muffled by Hunk's screams.

 

Three, both Pidge and Lance's phone vibrates.

 

Pidge walks to the kitchen, where she put her phone and sees that it was a text from the groupchat.

 

 

**haloweed ( 06:12 PM )**

 

 

**mattchiato**

yo we're here!

 

**mattchiato**

open the door you buffoons

 

**shookeith**

whose screams was that?

 

**death take me now**

What a great start of the party!

 

 

Pidge grinned at Shiro's reply - his humor is quite similar to hers after all - and she turns to Lance, who doesn't even bother to open his phone, "Lance, open the door! They're here!"

 

Lance groans, "Why don't _you_ open it?"

 

Pidge raised her eyebrow, " Do you want to take the popcorns instead?"

 

Lance groans again but he walks to the door, opening it, revealing an irritated Matt, a tired Keith - who's leaning to Shiro - and a smiling Shiro.

 

"What in the name of flying fuck took you so long?" Matt pushes his way in, pushing Lance in process, ignoring Lance's offended squeak, plopping into the green bean bag. Shiro smiles apologetically, "Sorry about him," his eyes wandered to Matt's form in the bean bag, "he didn't drink his coffee today," before getting in with his prosthetic arm around Keith's waist and walks inside.

 

"And who's fault was that?" Matt pouts at his place, arms folded and looking away from their direction. 

 

"Oh shut up, you hag," Pidge comes out of the kitchen holding four bowls of popcorn, two on each arms and pass each popcorn to them. "Also get away from my bean bag!"

 

Matt stucks out his tongue, "Well I sit here first so the early bird catches the worm,"

 

Pidge glares at him before going back to the kitchen with a _"Hmp!"_  , probably to take her poporn.

 

Keith holds his bowl and sits on the floor covered carpet, near the blue bean bag, eating some of the popcorn while Shiro sits on the edge of couch.

 

Lance could've sworn he saw Matt frowns but then he turns his head to Keith and talk with him, Keith leaning on the green and blue bean bags. 

 

Lance walks to his bean bag - the blue one - and listens to their chat, although most of his attention is towards Keith.

 

Shiro clears his throat, "Where's Hunk?"

 

"Searching for blankets,"

 

"... Was that his scream just now when we're outside?"

 

"Yup," Lance replied, munching some of the popcorn.

 

"He's nervous, isn't he?"

 

"Yup,"

 

Speak of the devil, Hunk comes back to the living room, arms full with thick blankets, "I found the blankets!"

 

Lance gives him a thumb up, "Nice, man,"

 

Keith makes a grabby hands at the blanket and Hunk throws him a purple blanket, he pass it to others as Keith lets out a muffled, "Thanks," just in time with Pidge coming in with popcorns.

 

Pidge puts the popcorn bowls on the table, and pick one of them before going to the yellow bean bag and snuggled into the red blanket. Hunk frowns at this.

 

"Hey, isn't that my spot?" Pidge just looks at him and smirks, "Not today,"

 

Lance stands up suddenly, almost stepping on Keith - who dodged at the last second, bless him - before holding both of Hunk's shoulder and push him onto the couch, right next to Shiro, who smiles at him in pity. Lance grins evilly at him and he could hear Matt and Keith's snickers and Pidge's cackles. "You are going to sit here with Shay,"

 

At the same time the door is knocked and Lance dashes to the door to open it as Hunk processed the words. Immediately Hunk stands and runs towards Lance's direction, "Lance!"

 

Pidge takes out her phone and put it near the TV, pressing the video button before going back to her spot. Matt lifts his hand and they high-fived.

 

"Send it to the group," Shiro reminded her with a grin.

 

Pidge saluted, "Will do!"

 

Meanwhile at the door, Lance and Hunk are wrestling to the door.

 

"Lance, no!"

 

"Lance,  _yes!"_

 

With that battle cry, he managed to get out of Hunk's grasped and opened the door.

 

" _Lance I am going to kill -_ oh hey Shay! Allura! You're here!" Hunk's glare turns into a smile - albeit fake, but it's better than none - as Allura raise her eyebrow at them, Shay beside her. 

 

Shay smiles at him warmly, "Hi, Hunk,"  _oh no, he's so done for her._

 

Hunk blush and smiles genuinely, "H-Hey, come on in!" pushing the door wider, while also hitting Lance with the door a bit harshly, the girls gets inside and Hunk shows them the living room, ignoring Lance mumbles, " _whipped,"_

 

Shay introduces herself to everyone - aka Matt - before sitting at the couch next to Hunk, smiling shyly at him with a small blush on her face. Hunk smiles back at her before glaring at his two best friends who are cooing at them.

 

( "Wait, her name is Shay?"

 

"Yes, Matt,"

 

" _I thought her name was Rockee!"_

 

"Why would her name be Rockee?"

 

"Shut up, Yorak!" )

 

"Okay so," Allura says, "We'll be watching horror movies until we all fell asleep!"

 

Hunk eyes widen and he jumped, "Allura!" at Allura's innocent face - which isn't innocent at all, more like a devil in disguise kind of face - he pointed out, fear dripping on his voice, "You know I hate it!"

 

"But it's haloween!"

 

"Not yet it is,"

 

Allura smirked, "Well then, let's vote," everyone's attention is now at Allura, "who wants to watch horror says 'me',"

 

"Me!" Pidge and Matt says at the same time, it's clear they both like horror, it runs in the Holt family.

 

Keith shrugs, "Me, I guess,"

 

Lance smirks at Hunk's misery, "Me too,"

 

Hunk's face has betrayal written all over and give the four of them the stink eye.

 

Allura laughs, "It settled then!"

 

"Wait, Shiro hasn't vote yet!" Everyone turns to look at the man, who is fast asleep, his popcorn bowl on the floor.

 

Shay smiles at him in pity, "Um...," she started shyly, "You can hold my hands if you're scared,"

 

He's certain that Pidge is biting her lips, smiling, while Lance is muffling his scream as heat travels to his cheeks.

 

"Y-Yeah of course! Thanks," he says genuinely and Shay smiles.

 

And so the horror movie commence.

 

On the first two movies, no one fell asleep - except for Shiro, he needed that - , everyone too absorbs with the story. Hunk keeps a tight grip on Shay's hand everytime something scary happens, and maybe because he wants to - but no one has to know that.

 

However at the middle of the third, Keith's head lulled before finally leaning on Lance's leg.

 

Pidge and Matt cooed softly as Lance glares at them, trying and somehow succeeding in changing Keith's sleeping position into a much comfortable one, not noticing Allura's phone recording him. Keith now sleeps between Lance's legs, back and head leaning on the bean bag and wrapped up by the blanket. He could've sworn Lance played with Keith's hair for a bit but then he could be wrong because right then there was a jumpscare - he gripped at Shay's hand as Shay squeeze back in comfort - and when he looked back at Lance, there was no evidence of it.

 

Looking at Allura's glee expression tells him that there is in fact an evidence.

 

At the fourth movie, Pidge fell asleep and Matt gasp softly at Pidge's sleeping face before taking a picture of it and winking at Allura, promising to send it to the group.

 

At the sixth movie, his eyelids becomes heavy and he closes his eyes, hand still holding Shay's, dreaming about a beautiful girl with black and green hair.

 

 

 

 

**> > >**

 

 

 

When he woke up, Shay is already gone.

 

Lance and Keith are still at their spot, Pidge is now at the couch, still asleep - Matt probably moved her into a comfortable position - , and Matt, Allura and Shiro are nowhere to be seen. 

 

"Hey, Hunk," Allura's croaky voice tells him that she also has just woken up, and he went to the kitchen, where Allura is drinking milk.

 

"Morning," opening the fridge, he starts to make breakfast, "where are the others?"

 

Allura looks up to the ceiling, looking thoughtfully, before replying, "Shiro has to teach and Matt has an early class that he forgot,"

 

_Typical Matt._

 

Allura smirks, "As for Shay," he blushed again, remembering yesterday's event, "she told me to call you to check your phone," before walking out of the kitchen, probably to wake the others up.

 

Hunk looks at her form questioningly before turning his phone on, eyes widen when he sees messages from someone

 

**shaylalala >>> hunkyew**

 

**shaylalala**

uh hey it's Shay 

 

**shaylalala**

i really like what we did yesterday, it was fun

 

 

**shaylalala**

and your friends are cool too

 

**shaylalala**

so uh, if you have this kind of thing happen again, can you invite me?

 

 

**shaylalala**

or maybe for smth else? :)

 

**shaylalala**

oh my god i cant believe i sent that

 

**shaylalala**

anyway thanks and please invite me again, you're a cool guy

 

**shaylalala**

i like sensitive guys after all ;)  

 

Hunk blushed and smiled at how she moves from shy girl into a fiery one and saw the last message and blushed harder.  _Is she flirting with me?_

 

He saved her number and replied:

 

 **hunkyew**  

of course :)

 

 **hunkyew**  

we'd love to invite you for more

 

**shaylalala**

:) great! wanna go on a date sometimes?

 

Hunk's eyes widen and he smiled so hard that his cheek hurts.

 

 **hunkyew**  

i would love to 

 

At the background he could hear Allura screaming, " _Wake up!_ " and Lance's screeching and Keith's groan. He also could most certainly heard Pidge's cursing and Allura's angry gasp.

 

But he doesn't care.

 

_I got a date!_

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hunay aint finish here, i still have something for them lmao
> 
> also anyone else cried in season 6 bcuz i sure as hell did ;-;
> 
> Allurance is so forced (reminds me of NaruSaku lololol) and Lotura is sinking, Sheith is also sinking but the 'I love you' keeps them going, other ships' shippers are giving up, bUT DONT WORRY KLANCE INTERACTION IN SEASON 7 SHALL SAVE US (according to our king, Jeremy Shada)
> 
> EDIT: Jeremy Shada who? S7 is bad lol but i love the pretty Keith content so
> 
> at least they give Keith some justice (UwU pretty boy)


	9. supercallifragilisticexpialidocious

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update when I said I'd update more often :)
> 
> Been working on another long oneshot about Voltron Demigods AU and I'm not even halfway done.
> 
> Enjoy this rushed chapter.

 

 **hunkuna matata >>> **  **the golden trio**

 

 **hunkuna matata:** ok i have a confession

 

 **LEGendary:** oh???

 

 **LEGendary:** a coNFESSION I SEE??

 

 **tide podge:** lmao shouldnt u send that to Shay

 

 **hunkuna matata:** yea that's what im about to talk about

 

 **tide podge:**?????

 

 **LEGendary:** did she hurt you

 

 **LEGendary:** Pidge, get my gun

 

 **tide podge:** on it

 

 **hunkuna matata:** hEY HEY NOW

 

 **hunkuna matata:** cALM DOWN PEOPLE

 

 **hunkuna matata:** it is nothING LIKE THAT

 

 **tide podge:** so what happen?

 

 **LEGendary:** still holding my gun

 

 **hunkuna matata:** pUT THE GUN DOWN LANCE

 

 **LEGendary:** fiNE

 

 **LEGendary:** now tell us,,,,

 

 **hunkuna matata:** remember when we invited Shay to our dorm?

 

 **tide podge:** yea?

 

 **LEGendary:** lol of course

 

 **LEGendary:** u guys were cuddling together when u sleep

 

 **hunkuna matata:** YOU WEREN'T EVEN AWAKE

 

 **LEGendary:** i know when my best friend is having a romantic moment

 

 **LEGendary:** and Allura send me the goods

 

 **hunkuna matata:** sigh

 

 **hunkuna matata:** of course she did

 

 **tide podge:** hypocrite

 

 **hunkuna matata:**?

 

 **LEGendary:** wat u mean Pidgey?

 

 **tide podge:** first of all, dont call me that

 

 **LEGendary:** noted

 

 **tide podge:** second of all

 

 **tide podge:** _[ image ]_

 

 **tide podge:** ure pretty gay with Keith that time too

 

 **LEGendary:** uhdsjnjdcnc

 

 **LEGendary:** hOW TF DID U GET THAT

 

 **LEGendary:** yOU WERE ASLEEP

 

 **tide podge:** Allura send me that lol

 

 **LEGendary:** fucking Allura

 

 **hunkuna matata:** that is pretty gay Lance

 

 **LEGendary:** wE'RE GETTING OFF TOPIC

 

 **LEGendary:** what happened

 

 **hunkuna matata:** she asked me out on a date

 

 **LEGendary:** hwat

 

 **tide podge:** im sorry but how???

 

 **hunkuna matata:** she have my phone number?? idek how but she had it??

 

 **LEGendary:** andddd???

 

 **hunkuna matata:** we went on a date yesterday

 

 **tide podge:** excuse my french but what the fuck

 

 **hunkuna matata:** you're italian

 

 **tide podge:** no im lesbian

 

 **LEGendary:**?? you are??

 

 **tide podge:** nah fam im ace

 

 **hunkuna matata:** AWW PIDGE WE STILL LOVE U

 

 **tide podge:** i know and thank u Hunk but this is not about me

 

 **tide podge:** this is about you

 

 **LEGendary:** yeA MAN WHAT THE FUCK

 

 **LEGendary:** wHY DIDNT U TELL US??

 

 **hunkuna matata:** wELL IM SORRY BUT WHAT IF IT DIDNT END WELL

 

 **tide podge:** pshhhh

 

 **LEGendary:** iMPOSSIBLE

 

 **hunkuna matata:** aNYWAY IM ABT TO HAVE ANOTHER DATE AGAIN TOMORROW AND IM BSCDNDMNHSMNS

 

 **LEGendary:** GET SOME BOI

 

 **hunkuna matata:** NOT HELPING AT ALL

 

 **tide podge:** dont worry guys

 

 **tide podge:** i got this

 

 **tide podge:** im gonna ask the others

 

 **tide podge:** subtlely ofc 

 

 **hunkuna matata:** he's gonna ask the whole gc isnt he

 

 **LEGendary:** he's gonna ask the whole gc lol

 

 

 

 

**haloweed ( 10:25 AM )**

 

 

 **green alien:** yall our homeboi Hunk is getting laid tomorrow

 

 **mattchiato:** OHHHH 

 

 **mattchiato:** GET SOME BROOO

 

 **literal sunshine:** this is why i rarely told you secrets

 

 **shookeith:** you're not better, Hunk.

 

 **loverboy lance:** tru, u read Pidge's diary and  my journal

 

 **death take me now:** You have a diary, Pidge?

 

 **green alien:** UNIMPORTANT QUESTION

 

 **literal sunshine:** he did, it was covered with 'aliens are real' stickers

 

 **green alien:** again

 

 **green alien:** UNIMPORTANT

 

 **loverboy lance:** in other news, he needs help

 

 **loverboy lance:** Hunk is not feeling good

 

 **death take me now:** Are you alright, Hunk?

 

 **literal sunshine:** Supercallifragilisticexpialidocious :)

 

 **mattchiato:** yeah we lost him

 

 **loverboy lance:** cmon man

 

 **loverboy lance:** you've went out with her yesterday u can do it again tomorrow

 

 **cherry bomb:** Wait

 

 **cherry bomb:** Is that why you asked me for my opinion in your clothes?

 

 **literal sunshine:** yes!!!11!

 

 **loverboy lance:** wait waht

 

 **loverboy lance:** wHY DIDNT U ASK ME??

 

 **green alien:** or me???

 

 **literal sunshine:** because i was hiding it from you

 

 **loverboy lance:** oh yeahhh

 

 **mattchiato:** what aboUT ME?

 

 **literal sunshine:** you're a disaster, Matt.

 

 **mattchiato:** okay fair

 

 **cherry bomb:** Lmao, I'm Hunk's first choice :p

 

 **literal sunshine:**... actually /nervous chuckle/

 

 **literal sunshine:** i asked Keith's opinion first

 

 **cherry bomb:** Say what now

 

 **shookeith:** lol.

 

 **loverboy lance:** im sorry but why

 

 **literal sunshine:** cuz!! he's pretty cool and had the bad boy aura so i thought??

 

 **shookeith:** just because I'm in the closet for long time does not mean I have a good taste of clothing.

 

 **death take me now:** Excuse me but you're never in the closet.

 

 **death take me now:** You just one day barge in the house and introduced me to your bf at that time.

 

 **shookeith:** as I said.

 

 **literal sunshine:** oKAY BUT GUYS HELP???

 

 **cherry bomb:** Dont worry I'm coming to your dorm

 

 **literal sunshine:** finally 

 

 **mattchiato:** GO GET SOME

 

 

 

 

 

**haloweed ( 09:22 PM )**

 

 

 **literal sunshine:** the date went great thank you everyone <3

 

 **cherry bomb:** Excuse me I did all the work

 

 **literal sunshine:** <3

 

 

 

 

**haloweed ( 11:22 AM )**

 

 

 **green alien:** im just gonna ask

 

 **green alien:** why are we learning about plants when we're not even one of them like??

 

 **green alien:** we dont photosynthesize

 

 **loverboy lance:** well maybe you'll turned to one

 

 **loverboy lance:** with how much u wear green

 

 **mattchiato:** if anything Pidge is a salt

 

 **death take me now:** Please don't throw him across the table when someone asked for a salt

 

 **literal sunshine:** what about me????

 

 **mattchiato:** sugar

 

 **shookeith:** what.

 

 **mattchiato:** you're a pepper

 

 **shookeith:** why

 

 **loverboy lance:** cuz u suck

 

 **shookeith:** AT LEAST I COULD SUCK SOMETHING

 

 **green alien:** savage

 

 **literal sunshine:** you walked into that one, Lance

 

 **loverboy lance:** fIGHT ME

 

 **death take me now:** Keith no

 

 **shookeith:** i'd rather kiss Mothman.

 

 **mattchiato:** you'd rather kiss Mothman than doing anything else

 

 **shookeith:** what's ur point?

 

 **mattchiato:** i

 

 **literal sunshine:** Lance no fighting at the parking lot

 

 **loverboy lance:** whomst Lance

 

 **loverboy lance:** the name's Pike

 

 **green alien:** your username is literally loverboy LANCE

 

**loverboy lance changed loverboy lance's name to loverboy pike**

 

 **loverboy pike:** i dont know what ure talking about

 

 **literal sunshine:** sigh

 

 **loverboy pike:** i have a question

 

 **cherry bomb:** Yes?

 

 **loverboy pike:** what's Matt real name?

 

 **death take me now:**?? Matt Holt??

 

 **loverboy pike:** yeah no shit man

 

 **loverboy pike:** i mean,,,, his real full name

 

 **literal sunshine:** he told me his name is Matthew Holt

 

 **death take me now:** he told me his name is Mattie Holt!

 

 **shookeith:** he told me his name is Mattheo Holt.

 

 **cherry bomb:** Okay why is everyone's answer are all different??

 

 **loverboy pike:** he toLD ME HIS NAME IS MATTHEMATICS HOLT WHAT THE FLYING FUCK

 

 **shookeith:** you believed him???

 

 **mattchiato:** you believed that???

 

 **loverboy pike:** no

 

 **cherry bomb:** I DID

 

 **cherry bomb:** HOW DARE YOU

 

 **mattchiato:** to be fair i was drunk and a disaster

 

 **mattchiato:**  besides no one knows about my first name >:)

 

 **loverboy pike:**  PIDGE??

 

 **green alien:** it's true i dont know at all

 

 **green alien:** i just call him Mattherine

 

 **mattchiato:** sacrifice me virgin then i'll answer lol

 

 **loverboy pike:** Keith, it's your turn to shine lmao

 

 **green alien:** im sure he doesnt mind being sacrified at all lmaoo

 

 **literal sunshine:** guys dont be mean

 

 **shookeith:** that wouldn't work.

 

 **green alien:** wat

 

 **literal sunshine:** what

 

 **loverboy pike:** hwat

 

 **death take me now:** Excuse me what?

 

 **shookeith:** wat.

 

 **mattchiato:** okay the awkwardness is so painful

 

 **cherry bomb:** As well as the embarassment

 

 **death take me now:** So you're not a virgin anymore?

 

 **shookeith:** yes, Shiro, I'm not.

 

 **death take me now:** It's a safe sex right?

 

 **loverboy pike:** andddd we're done

 

 **green alien:** we are not talking abt this here

 

 **literal sunshine:** ditto

 

 **cherry bomb:** Anyway. ~~~~

**cherry bomb:** This groupchat is not going to talk abt sex ok

 

 **loverboy pike:** awww

 

 **cherry bomb:** Keith, tell Lance where he can put his dick

 

 **shookeith:** in the refrigirator?

 

 **cherry bomb:** Keith no

 

 **literal sunshine:** there is no d in refrigirator

 

 **green alien:** not yet it is

 

 **death take me now:** There is a d in fridge if it helps.

 

 **loverboy pike:** SHIRO STApH

 

 **mattchiato:** anyway, abt the gc

 

 **cherry bomb:** Oh right

 

 **cherry bomb:** This is about funs and laughs so let's play a short game.

 

 **cherry bomb:** Let's put the word 'violently' in front of anything that describes action

 

 **death take me now:** Why?

 

 **cherry bomb:** It gets funnier

 

 **loverboy pike:** violently farts

 

 **green alien:** violently studies and hacks

 

 **death take me now:** Violently take a long nap.

 

 **mattchiato:** violently chugs coffee

 

 **shookeith:** violently kills Lance, Matt and Pidge and sell their bones.

 

 **literal sunshine:** violently worries over Keith's message

 

 **cherry bomb:** Why do I even bother

 

 **shookeith:** you tell me, Allura.

 

 

 

 

**You know what this is about ( 11:45 PM )**

 

 **death take me now:** Okay, guys, tomorrow is the day.

 

 **death take me now:** Matt, he's still oblivious about all of this right?

 

 **mattchiato:** yep

 

 **death take me now:** Good.

 

 **death take me now:** Allura? The decorations?

 

 **cherry bomb:** Most are already up in my place.

 

 **death take me now:** Hunk, the ingredients?

 

 **literal sunshine:** we bought it already, just need to bake it.

 

 **death take me now:** Pidge, nice work with the plannings.

 

 **green alien:** yeah np Shiro

 

 **death take me now:** And our distraction?

 

 **loverboy pike:** :3 dw everyone Lancey Lance has got it in the bag

 

 **death take me now:** Great!

 

 **death take me now:** Let's do this!

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always comments and kudos are deeply appreciated <3


	10. mission 1023

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Birthday is here and so is klance /dabs violently/

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> /writes another fanfic again and again/
> 
> I was busy writing other AUs and I almost forgot about this one lol.
> 
> Enjoy!

Today is the day.

 

Shiro is nervous, this had been the first time they had tried to do a surprise birthday party and it hadn’t backfired yet! Which is a shocking revelation with how nosy they are.

 

Shiro had been wrapping his present, after making sure that Keith didn’t notice it, with the help of Matt. And Keith didn’t, remain oblivious about the surprise. At least that’s what the last report Matt had sent.

 

Which reminds him that he should probably check on the situation.

 

Shiro went to his bedroom, having wrapping his present to Keith at the living room. He opened his phone and texted them, hoping there are no havoc.

 

**You know what this is about ( 10:11 AM )**

 

**death take me now**

Okay everyone, today is the day

 

**death take me now**

Are you guys ready?

 

The response is almost immediate.

 

**cherry bomb**

I’m ready, come here and help me with the decorations

 

**green alien**

aight mate im comin with mi coffee

 

**literal sunshine**

im baking the cake as we speak

 

**cherry bomb**

Matt, how many balloons have you blown?

 

**mattchiato**

um about three?

 

 

Shiro sighed, _typical Matt behavior._

**death take me now**

Matt

**mattchiato**

in my defense im gay

 

 **mattchiato**  

also i did this in the dorm and i have to make sure Keith doesnt notice lol

 

 

Wait what. Shiro eyes bugged out and he gripped his phone tightly.

 

 **death take me now**  

What do you MEAN you do it at the dorm?!

 

**green alien**

get the fuck out of there u son of a bitch

 

 **mattchiato**  

if im a son a bitch then you are too Pidgeo ;p

 

**cherry bomb**

Just get out there! And make sure Keith didn't see you!

 

**loverboy pike**

ay Matt im coming to your dorm to take Keith

 

 **mattchiato**  

door is unlocked Lance

 

 **mattchiato**  

aND HOW THE FUCK CAN I HIDE THESE FIVE BALLOONS?!

 

 **mattchiato**  

AND IT'S NEON COLORED

 

 **green alien**  

sounds like a you problem there lmao

 

 **death take me now**  

Just try Matt.

 

**death take me now**

Please.

 

**mattchiato**

okay im going out

 

 **mattchiato**  

oh shit guYS HE SEES ME

 

 **mattchiato**  

hE'S ASKING ME QUESTIONS JNDDCJNSCD

 

 **mattchiato**  

LANCE WHERE TF ARE U HELP ME

 

 **green alien**  

this is so sad, alexa play despacito

 

Shiro sighed, plopping on his bed, praying that Keith is still oblivious about this all.

 

_Lance is our only hope now._

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

 

**You know what this is about ( 10:32 AM )**

 

 **mattchiato**  

oh shit guYS HE SEES ME

 

 **mattchiato**  

hE'S ASKING ME QUESTIONS JNDDCJNSCD

 

 **mattchiato**  

LANCE WHERE TF ARE U HELP ME

 

Lance is running as fast as he can to their dorm. Now, if Matt had been good at hiding the fucking neon balloons, he won't have to run as if the devil is trying to catch him, but  _noooo_ , the universe just hates Lance so much, he probably loses lots of his gain weight at this moment. His phone lets out a sound and he slowed down a bit, checking out the message.

 

**mattchiato**

LANCE PLEASE MAN

 

 **green alien**  

fucking Matt,,,,

 

 **green alien**  

u better have a good and believable lie, Lance

 

 **loverboy pike**  

dont worry my boiz i gotchu covered ;)

 

He did not, in fact, got this covered at all.

 

Truthfully, Lance had no plan at all about what he lies he would say, choosing to make it an on the spot lie and just see where it goes, but now as he runs towards the dorm, he needs to think,  _fast._

  

Lance make a sharp turn, almost pushing his teacher, Slav, before he finally saw Keith and Matt, outside of their dorm, with Keith crossing both of his arms and looking at Matt weirdly and Matt, with a weirder smile and holding an indeed, five neon balloons. He looks like he was explaining something to Keith, with how much weird hand gestures he makes and Matt looks relieved when he saw Lance, "Lance, hey!"

 

Keith turns to his direction before scowling, "What are you doing here?"

 

"Uh... Happy...," Lance had no clue what to say, looking at Matt helplessly.

 

 _No happy birthday, don't you dare to say happy birthday, Lance!,_ Matt's eyes and smile screamed out.

 

Keith is looking at him strangely.

 

"Uh... Happy... friendship anniversary, Keith!" Lance smiled and hugged Keith.

 

 _Bitch, what the fuck,_ Matt smiled said.

 

Lance looked like he wants to die.

 

Keith is looking at him bewildered, or at least try to, since Lance had hid his face on the crook of Keith's neck, "Um.. what?"

 

Lance pulled away from the hug and smiled brightly, "It's our one month friendship anniversary! Yay!"  _Is it??_

 

Keith stared at him for a moment before his face twisted into a frown, "It is?"

 

Lance nodded vigorously, "Sure is, buddy! Here," taking all of Matt's neon balloons, he pushes it to Keith, forcing Keith's palm to open up and closed it when all the ribbons are in his hand, "this is for you! I asked Matt to make it and to keep it as a secret!" Lance smiled at Keith.

 

Matt laughed nervously, "Yep! Just for you, bro,"

 

Lance pushes Keith to the parking area's direction, "Now why don't you go to the parking area so we can hang out for the day to celebrate it?"

 

"Why are we even celebrating it?"

 

"Because it's an important day where I finally forgive your tacky jacket and even tackier hairstyle, now get going Mullet!" Lance shooes him and Keith gives him the finger before going to the parking lot.

 

Once he's out of view, they both let out a relieved sighed and Matt glared at Lance, "Why did you give all the balloons at him?"

 

Lance shrugged, "It's that or the party is cancelled, now go to Allura's and blow some balloons!"

 

Matt rolled his eyes and patted Lance's shoulder, "Okay, okay, have fun on the date, Loverboy," before running off.

 

"It's not a date!" He could hear Matt's laugh even when he's miles away from him.

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

**You know what this is about ( 12:22 PM )**

 

 **mattchiato**  

party's still on, Lance managed to cover me and they're on a date rn lol

 

**literal sunshine**

ayyyy get some Lance!

 

 **green alien**  

fucking finally

 

**loverboy pike**

it iS NOT A DATE

 

**cherry bomb**

oh he's in phase two of having a crush

 

**loverboy pike**

what

 

**cherry bomb**

the denial

 

 **green alien**  

ahh yes, De Nile river

 

**loverboy pike**

blocked

 

 **death take me now**  

Focus on task at hand people

 

**death take me now**

Then we could talk about Lance's crush on Keith

 

**loverboy pike**

bloCKED I TELL YOU 

 

**loverboy pike**

BLOCKED

 

 **mattchiato**  

this is so gay alexa play hayley kiyoko

 

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

"So ...," Keith started, "why are we doing all this?" he gestured to the McDonalds.

 

Lance had wanted to take him to a pizza palore before Keith had all but dragged him to McDonalds, craving for burgers. Since it was cheaper and tastes better, Lance had allowed it and they have eaten four cheeseburgers.

 

"All what?" Lance tried to play coy but Keith shot him an unimpressed look, "Okay, okay, stop looking at me like that!"

 

Keith eyes soften and he looked around, "Why are you bringing me here all of a sudden?" 

 

"Because, my sweet, sweet Keefers," Lance cupped both of Keith's cheeks and squished them together, "it's our friendship anniversary, remember?" he talked slowly, as if talking to a toddler.

 

Keith blushed at their proximity and pulled Lance's hands away from his red face and pouted angrily, "I mean, do you do that with others too? I'm pretty sure you don't, so why do it with me?"

 

 _That's a solid argument._ Lance smirked, "That's cuz you're special," and winked.

 

Keith's blush darkens and he glared at Lance,  _oh well, it's not a lie anyway._

 

"Besides, we haven't hangout in a long time," which is again, true, so this will disperse Matt's suspicious behaviour, "And I want to hangout with you,"

 

Okay where the hell did that came from.

 

Keith opened his mouth but Lance cuts him off, "Like a friend kind of thing! You know, since we're friends now but we rarely went together as a friends! And you're cool and pretty," Lance stopped and stared at Keith's blushing face, mouth agape, "funny and it's fun to be with you and- I'll stop talking now," 

 

Lance curses himself as the awkward silence stays. Keith looks at him calculatingly, frowning and folding his arms, food forgotten. His blush had dispersed and is probably trying to find a way to get away from this situation. Lance hangs his head low, waiting for the words to come out. 

 

Keith broke the silence and said softly, "Okay,"

 

"Okay I'm sorry but- wait what," Lance snapped his head to Keith. Keith looked oddly happy, standing in front of him, smiling and had his hand out for Lance. Lance took his hand tentatively and pulled himself up, "what gives?"

 

"Just like you said, we rarely hangout," Keith shrugged and looked at Lance's bandaged fingers, "what happened to your hands?" he furrowed his eyebrows.

 

The Cuban smirk, "I was beating up some bullies yesterday,"  _a total lie._

 

Keith just looked at him unimpressed, "Uhuh, sure, let's go," and they walked towards the exit.

 

Lance smiled brightly and pulled him to the nearest arcade, bickering on the way.

 

They both didn't realize that their hands are still linked together.

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

**You know what this is about ( 01:20 PM )**

 

**literal sunshine**

cake is ready, Shiro i need you

 

 **mattchiato**  

taKASHI I CHOOSE YOU /throws pokeball/

 

 **death take me now**  

On it, Hunk.

 

**death take me now**

Matt, stop and do your job

 

**mattchiato**

but my mouth is sore from blowing

 

**literal sunshine**

im sorry but what the fuck Matt

 

**cherry bomb**

I spit my fucking tea

 

 **green alien**  

dear diary, today i realize my brother is a cockslut, he had blow so many times, his mouth is sore

 

**mattchiato**

wAIT NO IT'S NOT LIKE THAT

 

 **mattchiato**  

TAKASHI BACK ME UP HERE

 

 **death take me now**  

read ( 01:23 PM )

 

**green alien**

lol burn

 

 **mattchiato**  

thiS IS NOT THE TIME TO MEME U BITCH

 

 **green alien**  

also Allura, u gotta buy the drinks

 

**cherry bomb**

On it

 

**literal sunshine**

this is so fun, alexa play 'this vine cured my depression'

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

When they made it to the arcade, the first thing that caught Lance's eyes is the Dance, Dance, Revolution game. Its stage is huge, fitting two people with many space between them, having blue and pink and purple neon color to attract eyes, is stated to be one of the hardest game there and is currently unoccupied.

 

Now everyone knows about Lance's competitive streak, which turned worse when Keith is in a different team, and everyone  _also_ knows about Keith's habit of easily riled up, even more if the person trying to do it is Lance, and usually when there are their friends nearby or with them, they're competition will be stopped immediately  _or_ will be used as a betting pool (mostly stopped sadly) and since they're both alone...

 

Lance's eyes flared with his competitive nature, side eyeing Keith, who has his eyes trained to the racing game, and Lance pointed to the DDR machine, "Let's play that!" 

 

Keith didn't even turn to look, "No,"

 

Lance pouted, "Oh c'mon! You didn't even see it!"

 

"It's a DDR game isn't it," Keith stated and tore his eyes away from the racing game and stared at the DDR machine in disdain, as if used to this type of situation - which he is but not the point.

 

"I- Yeah but- You gotta play it with me, man!" Lance whined, flapping both of his arms like a bird.

 

Keith rolled his eyes, "No, and that's final,"

 

_"Why?!"_

 

"I'm not good at that," Keith mumbled, looking away from the machine. Lance would have laughed at him if this is in a different situation, but he wanted Keith to play with him.

 

"Psh, you scared, Mullet Man?" Lance pulled out the card.

 

Keith eyes narrowed, his eyes flaring and he glared at Lance, _"What?"_ Ok, that's pretty hot.

 

Lance smirked, happy that Keith took his bait, "You're scared that I win,"

 

Keith's eyes throw daggers at him but he stood his ground, although he too is scared at what Keith will do next.

 

_Mark me down as scared and horny._

 

Suddenly he felt his arm being pulled and Lance realized that Keith had dragged him to the DDR machine,  _success!_

 

Lance was pushed to one of the stage and he let out a small, " _oof!_ " and glared at Keith.

 

Keith didn't acknowledge him, instead picking a random song and a random level before pressing the middle part of his and Lance's.

 

"Wha- Hey! I'm not ready yet!" Lance missed a few of his steps before finally getting his beat and played fluently. He turned to look how Keith's doing and he can't help but smirk.

 

Keith, true to his words, fucking sucks at DDR. He misses most of the steps and his face is scrunched up in concentration. It would've look cute had Keith's eyes didn't screamed pure anger and frustration. When the game ended, with Lance earning an A and Keith an E, Lance laughed at him and Keith shot him a glare, "Shut up! I told you I'm bad at this!"

 

"Yeah, but I didn't know you were _this_ bad!" Lance sniggered, pointing at Keith's final score, his stomach hurting from laughing at Keith.

 

Keith rolled his eyes, "Well shit, sorry that I didn't waste my time playing this stupid game,"

 

Lance throws his arm around Keith's shoulder, "I can teach you how to play this game better," and winked down at Keith.

 

Keith went silent for a moment, his face turned red from anger? embarrassment? before he elbowed Lance in the gut and move to the racing game as Lance holds his abdomen, groaning, "Hey! What the fuck man?"

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

**You know what this is about ( 03:13 PM )**

 

**cherry bomb**

I GOT THE DEEDS PEOPLE

 

 **mattchiato**  

MY MOUTH IS FUCKING DRY GIVE IT TO ME

 

**literal sunshine**

im almost done with the marshmallow and chocolate!

 

 **green alien**  

im tRYING TO HIDE MY STUPID GIFT

 

 **mattchiato**  

i still dont understand why u bought that of all things

 

 **green alien**  

shut your fucking mouth

 

 **death take me now**  

Have we bought the confetti?

 

**cherry bomb**

...

 

 **mattchiato**  

...

 

 **green alien**  

...

 

**literal sunshine**

...

 

 **death take me now**  

I'll buy the confetti.

 

**green alien**

thanks dad ur the best

 

**literal sunshine**

oh should i bring UNO or Monopoly?

 

 **death take me now**  

None of those.

 

**loverboy pike**

boTH

 

**loverboy pike**

fuCKING BOTH 

**literal sunshine**

aight fam

 

 **death take me now**  

I have many regrets.

 

**death take me now**

Why are you texting here? Shouldn't you make sure Keith didn't find out?

 

**loverboy pike**

yeah he elbowed me in the gut so im crumpled o the ground and he left me there lol

 

**mattchiato**

may i ask why

 

 **loverboy pike**  

he lost in the DDR game lmao

 

**literal sunshine**

...

 

**literal sunshine**

maybe i shouldn't bring UNO and Monopoly

 

**green alien**

nope youre bringing it and it's final

 

 **loverboy pike**  

oh shit he's back

 

**cherry bomb**

aww he's worried about your wellbeing

 

 **death take me now**  

Enjoy your date, Lance :)

 

**loverboy pike**

it is NOT A DATE JCHNDMCJC DAD

 

 **green alien**  

lol sure jan

 

**loverboy pike**

this is so rude, alexa play 'hollaback girl'

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

"Lance?" Keith shook his body, "Let's go somewhere else," he crouched down next to Lance's body.

 

Lance groaned at the floor, still clutching his abdomen, "No, I'm in too much pain,"

 

Keith rolled his eyes, "You're too dramatic, c'mon, where to next?"

 

Lance ignored him and closed his eyes, "Goodbye world, I, Lance McClain, died in the hands of my friend, Keith Kogane, I hope my killer eat rock and die too," He could heard Keith's groan and pushed down the urge to smile.

 

He felt the wamth presence beside him moved and panicked for a moment,  _is he leaving me? What the fuck, Keith, friendship ended,_ before he felt an arm wrapping under his shoulder and another under his thighs and he felt himself being lifted up and Lance opened his eyes, squealing, _"What the fuck?!"_

 

Keith looked down at him, raising his eyebrow, "you weren't going to move, so I lifted you up," as if it was a very logical answer.

 

Lance looked at him incrediously and struggled in Keith's arms, "Put me down, Captain Doofus,"

 

Keith smirked, "With pleasure," before dropping him to the ground unceremoniously. Lance let out a scream and glared at Keith as he rubbed his sore butt, "That's mean!"

 

Keith raised his hands up at him, "You said to put you down, I did exactly that," he smirked but put his hand out to help Lance up.

 

Lance patted his clothes and pants to cleaned it up a bit and Keith watched him before asking "So?"

 

When Lance just stared at him blankly, Keith sighed, "where are we going next?"

 

Lance thought for awhile and pulled him, "Okay, let's go!"

 

"Go where?"

 

"The beach!"

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

**You know what this is about ( 05:32 PM )**

 

 **death take me now**  

I have the confettis.

 

**mattchiato**

aww good job daddy

 

**death take me now**

No.

 

**green alien**

wait i think we're forgetting something

 

 **literal sunshine**  

thE FOOD OH MY GOD

 

 **green alien**  

we have?? cake??

 

**cherry bomb**

And chocolate and marshmallow

 

**literal sunshine**

with how much we each eat it wont be enough!!!1!

 

 **mattchiato**  

shit u rite

 

**death take me now**

Order pizza, now.

 

**death take me now**

Eight boxes.

 

**literal sunshine**

ten boxes, got it.

 

**death take me now**

I give up.

 

**death take me now**

This is so bad, Alexa play 'This is Gospel'

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

"Ta-da!" Lance opens his arms to show the display of the beach.

 

The beach was a beauty, the sun almost setting, giving it an orange hue to the sky, the sand still glistening clear and the water have its dark contrast to the orange hue. The sky is cloudy, blurring the image of the sun and giving it a lighter color. 

 

Keith looked at the view in amazement before looking at Lance, "Move, you're ruining the view," he joked, a smile tugging to his lips.

 

Lance winked, "Keith, hun, I am the view, now take off your shoes,"

 

Keith scowled at him, his face red - why is his face red so many times today? - and started to take his shoes off with Lance following suit. 

 

"Alright, c'mon, man!"

 

Didn't wait for Keith's reply, Lance pulled him to near the water before sitting there, his feet brushing the water.

 

Keith sits beside him, "So... why the beach?"

 

Lance shrugged, "I don't know, I just thought it would be nice to be here,"

 

To his surprise, Keith agreed, "Yeah, it is nice, I can't go to the beach at afternoon though," at Lance's questioning gaze he explained, "I get easily sunburnt," Keith pointed to his pale skin, which has a bit red tinge to it.

 

 _Huh, it looked pretty smooth, I wanna touch it,_ "You know, I always went to the beach when I was at Cuba," Lance smiled, "The Varadero Beach is the best one, luckily I lived near there," Keith listened to him intently, his dark blue eyes looking at him, "Sure it was crowded but, it was fun, with my family,"

 

"You're still homesick?" Keith asked.

 

Lance nodded, "Why didn't you tell the others," Keith pressed on.

 

"Don't want to bother them," Lance mumbled and Keith nodded, "Okay,"

 

A beat.

 

"Can you tell me more about your family?"

 

Lance smiled.

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

**You know what this is about ( 06:47 PM )**

 

**mattchiato**

FOOD'S HERE YAY

 

 **literal sunshine**  

dont eat it yet, guys, the birthday boy isn't here yet

 

**mattchiato**

whoops sorry mom

 

 **death take me now**  

Lance, you can bring Keith here now.

 

**cherry bomb**

Lance?

 

 **green alien**  

are they??? you know?? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

**death take me now**

Not on my watch, they're not.

 

**loverboy pike**

wE ARE NOT EXCUSE U

 

**loverboy pike**

also yea we're going

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

"Lance, where are we going?" Keith asked, they are in their college now, heading towards their dorm, "My dorm is over there," Keith pointed towards his and Matt's room. Lance smiled at him secretively, almost evilly and said, "I left something at Allura's yesterday, I need your help to take it,"

 

He asked again, "Why are you even at Allura's?"

 

Lance just winked and the only thing he felt is  _wow I sure with I was Allura._

 

It is a big secret that Keith had a crush on Lance. A big secret he kept only to himself. He was sure that none of his freinds know about it, hiding it skillfully and rarely indulge his crush on Lance in public, opting to do it in private or with the group.

 

**You know what this is about ( 07:24 PM )**

 

 **loverboy pike**  

guys we're near, get ready to hide

 

Keith had long ago accept his feelings towards the Cuban boy, learning about it from past experiences with his ex boyfriend, and had tried to suppress it since Keith realized that Lance did not, in fact, like him, and instead thought of him as a rival. He accepted it just so Lance would still talked to him, although sometimes on a rare occasion Lance's words had hurt his feelings.

 

**mattchiato**

 aight

 

When Lance had ignored him, Keith can't help but feel like it's fault. His mood turned worse and he tried to talk some sense to Lance when he realizes what's wrong. And after that, he was upgraded to a friend.

 

**green alien**

 be careful Lance, dont want you to get punch lol

 

It was enough for Keith.

 

**loverboy pike**

um rude

 

Sure it would be better to be his boyfriend, but he didn't mind being friends with him, liking it even. He doesn't mind, even if he's only a friend in Lance's eyes. It's pathetic but it's better than none. Even though all of them forgot about his birthday, he's happy he could spent it with Lance.

 

**death take me now**

Everyone hold your confettis and keep quiet.

 

Keith is brought back from his pathetic monologue of his relationship with Lance when he realized they're in front of the door.

 

**cherry bomb**

we're ready

 

Lance smiled, "Ladies first,"

 

**literal sunshine**

lights are off

 

Keith rolled his eyes, "I'm a man, you know,"

 

**mattchiato**

confettis at hand pachuuu

 

"Just open the fucking door, Kogane!"

 

**literal sunshine**

iM BUZZING

 

Keith opened the door, "Okay, okay, wh- "

 

"SURPRISE!"

 

He let out a sound of shock and suddenly there are popping sounds.

 

Confettis are thrown at him, the streams stuck at his hair and clothes, shoutings, the lights suddenly on and hugging.

 

Lots and lots of hugging. 

 

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

 

Wait what.

 

Slowly everyone let go of hi and Keith took notice of the surroundings, neon balloons floating on the ceiling, ribbons and decorations everywhere, a 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEITH' written on a particular huge cloth and is stuck on the wall and lots of food on the table and another table filled with presents.

 

Everyone is looking at him, a smile plastered on their face and a hopeful look on too.

 

Keith's eyes watered.

 

"Oh no, here comes the water works," Hunk cried out and hugged Keith again.

 

The dam broke and everyone is hugging him again.

 

He doesn't mind though, because they're his friends.

 

And his family.

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

"Wait so all of you prepare this?" Keith asked in disbelief. After the hug, they all sit on the couches at Allura's living room. There are three couches, with Shiro and Matt in the first, Pidge, Allura and Lance at the second and Hunk and Keith at the third. The food and presents are moved to the table in the middle and they each held the presents.

 

Shiro nodded, "Suprisingly, yes," he shot Matt a dirty look.

 

Pidge pointed her thumb at Matt, "This idiot almost blew it with the balloons," 

 

Matt pouted, "I work hard on that! What did you even do to it?"

 

"I gave it to some random kid I saw passing by," 

 

"Anyway," Allura clapped her hands when Matt looked like he was about to throw hands with Keith, "open your presents, Keith!"

 

Pidge slipped out of the couch, "I gotta take my present," and move upstair.

 

Shiro smiled, "Here, I'll give you my present first," the present is rectangular and is wrapped messily with a blue paper.

 

Keith tore it apart and gasp, "Holy _shit_ ,"

 

Shiro raised his eyebrow jokingly, "You're already saying it and now you're worshipping shit?" He had a huge smile on his face.

 

It was a telescope. The newest, brand new telescope made by the Garisson Inc and is one of the most expensive telescope. It may be expensive but it really is useful, able to see many more constellations and stars and even planets and comets.

 

Lance slammed his hands on the table, "Oh c'mon! How the flying fuck can we top that shit?!" Matt, Hunk and Allura nodded in agreement.

 

Pidge came back from upstair, "Yo, what the hap is fuckening?" and then she stared at the telescope at Keith's hand, "no  _fucking_ way," she said disbelievingly, "how are we topping _that_?!"

 

"How ...?" Keith is left surprised and Shiro explained, "My friend gave it to me with a discount, I only paid 40% of it,"

 

"Uhuh," Keith nodded, his hand tracing the box lovingly and Hunk laughed before giving a wrapped rectangular box to Keith.

 

As Keith tore it apart Hunk looked nervous, "So I thought that since you like astronomy and since you're a major of it I thought maybe you would like books regarding it and I thought you might be interested in some of the mythologies and stories behind it even though you don't really believe in it, but I just thought that you would like the theories I also bought you some theories of planets and stars and also cryptids because I know you love it so I ju- _oof!_ " Keith hugged Hunk when he saw all the content of the books. It was one of those books where you're interested but don't have enough money to buy so you just left it there, hoping you could buy it.

 

"Thank you, Hunk," Keith let go of Hunk and Hunk smiled brightly at him, relaxed, "No problem, man,"

 

Allura smiled and throw him her gift, and when it plopped to Keith's lap, he was surprised by how soft it is and when he opened the wrappings he was surprised to see a jacket at his hands. It wasn't like his yellow and red bomber jacket where "it has no use and is impractical, Keith, it didn't even reach your fucking abdomen!", it was a size bigger than the one he used to use, its color is black with some purple lines along the way, and apparently it has a hood. 

 

Matt screeched, "Is that a fucking Marmora jacket?" Lance gasped at the name while Pidge looked confused, "What's Marmora?"

 

"A famous store with an even more famous jacket and is one of the most expensive clothing line, ever!"

 

That caught Keith's attention and he smiled, "Thanks, 'Lur."

 

Allura blow him a kiss in reply.

 

The next one is Lance and he, like Allura, throws his present to Keith. It was also soft but unlike the others', it was hidden in a fancy plastic bag. Keith opened the ribbon that tied it tentatively and take out what's inside. Keith gasped in delight and surprise. 

 

A red hippo doll.

 

It was sewed neatly, the body made perfectly, the eyes are black and it's actually pretty huge, it was probably as huge as Pidge's shoulder to thighs. Looking at Lance's bandaged fingers it clicked to his mind. A  _handmade_ red hippo plushie.

 

Lance is looking at him expectantly and Pidge raised her eyebrow, "Hippos?"

 

Shiro is also surprised, "Hippos are his favorite animal," he looked at Lance then avert his eyes to Keith before back to Lance, "how did you know that?"

 

Lance shrugged simply, "He told me, we were talking about favorite animals and he said that his favorite is hippos," 

 

Hunk cooed, "Aww, that's cute,"

 

Keith glared at Hunk, "Excuse me? Hippos are among the most dangerous animals in the world cuz it's highly aggressive and unpredictable.  _That_ is why I like them,"

 

Hunk sobered immediately, "Okay not so cute then,"

 

Lance impatiently asked, "Sooo?" 

 

Keith rolled his eyes, "Gee thanks Lance, I love it," he said sarcastically but he send Lance a happy smile and hugged the hippo experimentally.

 

Matt slides his gift from the floor, "Okay, first of all, I'm sorry. Second of all, I'm not sorry,"

 

Keith looks at the gift warily before unwrapping it carefully and he looked at Matt unimpressed when he saw it, "Seriously, Matt? Seriously?"

 

Lance, Pidge and Hunk are laughing when they saw what is in Keith's hand, "Holy shit, best gift ever!" Shiro and Allura are holding their laughter.

 

A fucking Alexa.

 

Matt bought him a fucking Alexa.

 

After laughing at Matt's gift, it as finally Pidge's turn.

 

Pidge laughed nervously, "Okay so I bought it impulsively because I seriously have no idea what to give you," and she opened a cage?

 

Coming out of the cage is a dog.

 

"It's a Shiba Inu," Allura noted.

 

The dog look at Keith for a second before it jumped towards Keith's lap. Its eyes looking at Keith's for a moment before it relaxed and curled on his lap. Keith played with its fur and asked, "Why a dog?"

 

Pidge shrugged, "Like I said, I have no idea, it's a he by the way,"

 

Lance is pulling out his phone, recording all of this, Shiro is looking at their interaction with wet eyes, Hunk is shuffling away from Keith and the dog ( "I'm not used to dogs okay?" ) and Allura and Matt watching them.

 

"Thanks Pidge, I love it," Pidge smiled back in relief and sits back on the couch, " So what are you gonna name it?"

 

The dog suddenly raised up from his position and he look at Keith, 

 

"Uh ...," he looked at the red hippo beside him, "Red?"

 

The dog looked at him for awhile before he seemed to nod and lick his cheek.

 

"This is so cute, Alexa play despacito," Matt joked.

 

Everyone's eyes are now on Matt.

 

"Matt no!"

 

"Fuck you Matt!"

 

"What the hell Matt!"

 

Even Matt looks like he wanted to kill himself at that moment.

 

But it's too late, and Despacito is played by the ever glorious Alexa.

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

The next day, Matt woke up to a sound of puking.

 

"What the fuck?" Matt wondered out loud, walking to the bathroom. There in all his glory, is Keith, puking with Red beside him.

 

"What the fuck, Keith!" Matt patted his back comfortingly, "what the hell did you eat?"

 

"Hunk's cake," Keith managed to mumbled out.

 

_"Here's the cake, Keith!" Hunk smiled widely, passing the cake to Keith, giving him a huge piece._

 

_Keith smiled and took an experimental bite before he stopped._

 

_There is a fucking milk. Keith could taste the milk just by chewing it, the sweet drink that has always his favorite and will probably be the death of him._

 

_Hunk looked at him worriedly, "Why? What's the matter? Is it too sweet?"_

 

_Lance laughed, "Hunk, your food brings everybody to they yard," he sang._

 

_Hunk calmed down a little but still looked panicked._

 

_Should I tell him there's milk and watched him feel sad or should I just eat it and die?_

 

_Keith smiled, "Yeah, it tasted good," before scooping a big chunk and eat it. After all, it's a win-win situation._

 

_Probably._

 

_Seeing Hunk's relieved and happy smile makes him not regretting his choice._

 

_Matt and Shiro are going to be so mad at me._

 

"I am so mad at you!" Matt cried out accusingly.

 

Keith just laughed before fainting.

 

"Keith? Keith? Goddamit," Matt grumbled and carried Keith into his room, throwing him unceremoniously to the bed.

 

Taking out his phone, Matt began to text the groupchat.

 

**haloweed ( 10:22 AM )**

 

**mattchiato**

 

well i gotta tell you Hunk, your cake sure bring everybody to the yard

 

**literal sunshine**

 

what?

 

**loverboy pike**

 

whomst

 

**green alien**

 

hell yea it did

 

**cherry bomb**

 

who did it bring?

 

**mattchiato**

 

it bring Keith to the yard

 

**mattchiato**

 

to the graveyard that is

 

**mattchiato**

 

help

 

**death take me now**

 

/sigh/ Well that's our birthday boy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be honest, I googled color tones just to clarify what Keith's eye color is which I think is either Prussian Blue or Oxford Blue :///
> 
> Lance in a turtleneck and fingerless gloves from the old scrap is so hot why didn't they use it??? The Bi Icon.
> 
> Comments and kudos are welcomed and is greatly appreciated!!
> 
> Also, read my other AU if you're interested :)


	11. hush, blush, crush

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be longer but to quote my son, Keith; "I don't have time for this [Lance],"
> 
> Staying at South Korea and the first thing I see when I get out of the airport is protesters against marriage of same sex and LGBTQ+.
> 
> I hate Asia (and being Asian) sometimes.

**haloweed ( 11:32 AM )**

 

 **green alien:** GUAYS

 

 **mattchiato:** yea??

 

 **green alien:** i said guays not dude

 

 **mattchiato:** there is a gay in guays

 

 **mattchiato:** so technically speaking, youre callin me

 

 **green alien:** u aint gay bih

 

 **shookeith:** i am.

 

 **green alien:** Keith is

 

 **green alien:** gasp

 

 **shookeith:** bro <3

 

 **green alien:** bro <3

 

 **cherry bomb:** Is your pronoun he/him today, Pidge?

 

 **green alien:** who needs pronoun when you could just choose bronoun amirite

 

 **green alien:** it's she/her actually

 

 **cherry bomb:** Aight

 

**loverboy pike _changed_  loverboy pike's _name to_ lonce mcclain**

 

 **lonce mcclain:** when u gotta channel your inner Allura lmfao

 

 **cherry bomb:** Panphobic blocked

 

 **death take me now:** Guys, stop

 

 **death take me now:** Pidge, tell us why you summon us

 

 **green alien:** u make it sound like you all are cryptids

 

 **shookeith:** *yall,,,,

 

 **green alien:** I FUCKING SWEAR CHILD

 

 **lonce mcclain:** mATT, PIDGE SAYS FUCK

 

 **mattchiato:** dw guys i got this

 

 **mattchiato:** what the fuck, Pidge

 

 **literal sunshine:** gUYS PLEASE

 

 **shookeith:** we need to focus.

 

 **lonce mcclain:** wE nEeD tO fOcUs

 

 **shookeith:** fucka you.

 

 **lonce mcclain:** fucka u

 

 **death take me now:** Guys.

 

 **green alien:** right!!! so

 

 **green alien:** the whole fucking college are having haloween party so we could wear our costume during thr day in class

 

 **shookeith:** no.

 

 **literal sunshine:** yAY FRIENDS GROUP COSTUME FEST

 

 **death take me now:** Well, sucks to be you, Keith.

 

 **death take me now:** I'll laugh at your costumes.

 

 **green alien:** teachers too

 

 **death take me now:** no

 

 **mattchiato:** UwU mwistew Shiwo 

 

 **death take me now:** perish

 

 **cherry bomb:** aBoUt tHat......... ..... 

 

 **cherry bomb:** tHE COSTUMES ISNT GOING TO COME ON HALOWEEN

 

 **lonce mcclain:** wHAT

 

 **literal sunshine:**  hOW??????

 

 **mattchiato:**  nande

 

 **mattchiato:** nANDE

 

 **shookeith:** fuCK YEAH

 

 **death take me now:** thank god

 

 **cherry bomb:** I'm sorry!! the shipping took so long and it wont come on time!! :'(

 

 **shookeith:** guess we won't have to dress up (:(

 

 **lonce mcclain:** is that.... a happy face or a sad one???

 

 **shookeith:** yes

 

 **cherry bomb:** ohoHOHOHO

 

 **literal sunshine:** um gASP

 

 **death take me now:** IS THAT?? ALLURA'S EVIL LAUGH??

 

 **cherry bomb:** bold of you to assume i have no backup plan >:)

 

 **shookeith:** oH NO

 

 **green alien:** aYYYYEEE

 

 **lonce mcclain:** i stan one (1) girl

 

 **death take me now:** Allura please

 

 **cherry bomb:** aLLuRa pLeaSe

 

 **mattchiato:** good job sweetie <3

 

 **cherry bomb:** <3

 

 **literal sunshine:** so whats it about??

 

 **cherry bomb:** It's.... ...

 

 **cherry bomb:** Drumroll pls

 

 **mattchiato:** /le drumroll/

 

 **cherry bomb:** iTS A PARTNER COSTUME THEME

 

 **lonce mcclain:** YEAHHHH

 

 **cherry bomb:** ALSO A CONTEST

 

 **lonce mcclain:** OH YEAHHH BABY

 

 **literal sunshine:** bro?

 

 **lonce mcclain:** bro

 

 **green alien:** oh my god, srsly????

 

 **literal sunshine:** bro bro bro bro broooo?

 

 **lonce mcclain:** bro bro bro bro <3

 

 **death take me now:** What are they doing.

 

 **mattchiato:** shhh theyre bromunicating

 

 **literal sunshine:** bro bro bro bro bro bro, brooo, bro?

 

 **lonce mcclain:** bro, bro bro, bro <3

 

 **death take me now:** Why are they talking like that?

 

 **cherry bomb:** the bros dont need reasons.

 

 **lonce mcclain:** ok guys Hunk cant join cuz he wanna be coupley w his gf

 

 **literal sunshine:** LANCE

 

 **lonce mcclain:** whoops sorry

 

 **lonce mcclain:** i mean wife

 

 **green alien:** oHHHH GET SOME BOI

 

 **cherry bomb:** aww Hunk thats sweet choosing ur gf over us :)

 

 **literal sunshine:** sHE IS NOT MY GIRLFRIEND SHE IS JUST A GIRL THAT I ADMIRE VERY MUCH

 

 **cherry bomb:** Hunk

 

 **literal sunshine:** but im not leaving u guys cuz i love u so im joining w the group but i wont join the contest

 

 **death take me now:** Or you could join it with Shay?

 

 **literal sunshine:** that works too

 

 **cherry bomb:** Okay then!

 

 **cherry bomb:** So the groups are....

 

 **cherry bomb:** Choose a number from 1-6

 

 **shookeith:** why

 

 **cherry bomb:** I've picked two pieces of paper from number 1-6 for each group so now pick!!

 

 **shookeith:** 1

 

 **lonce mcclain:** 1

 

 **lonce mcclain:** fuck

 

 **shookeith:** :P

 

 **death take me now:** 2

 

 **lonce mcclain:** 2!!

 

 **death take me now:** Sorry Lance

 

 **lonce mcclain:** no prob, dad

 

 **death take me now:** Can't I at least be uncle?

 

 **mattchiato:** /chuckles/ wRONG

 

 **mattchiato:** 5

 

 **lonce mcclain:** 3!!!

 

 **lonce mcclain:** VICTORY

 

 **green alien:** uh 6 i guess

 

 **cherry bomb:** oKay!!

 

 **cherry bomb:** So the team are: 2 and 6, 1 and 5, 3 and 4

 

 **mattchiato:** kOGANE AYYYEEEE

 

 **shookeith:** hey Lance, you still want to be number 1?

 

 **lonce mcclain:** fuck no, im w Allura, im gonna win!!!11!

 

 **death take me now:** sigh Pidge

 

 **green alien:** Takashi Shirogane

 

 **green alien:** dont put shame on my name 

 

 **cherry bomb:** wELL THAT SETTLED!! LETS SEE ON WEDNESDAY!

 

 **shookeith:** can I PLEASE not be in the same group as Matt??

 

 **shookeith:** last two years was enough!!

 

 **mattchiato:** wE DO NOT TALK ABOUT THAT ANYMORE

 

 **shookeith:** I ALMOST DIED

 

 **mattchiato:** BUT YOU DIDNT

 

 **literal sunshine:** im scared on Keith's behalf

 

 **death take me now:** Wait so that halowwen day where u went to the hospital is because of Matt??

 

 **shookeith:** _YES_

 

 **green alien:** woah woah woah

 

 **green alien:** what happened

 

 **lonce mcclain:** Allura??

 

 **cherry bomb:** Suddenly i can not read

 

 **cherry bomb:** Adios amigos

 

 **green alien:** ALLURAFUCKABLE

 

 **cherry bomb:** Chingate <3

 

 **lonce mcclain:** she makes it sounds like a pet name when its rlly not

 

 **mattchiato:** we are NOT talking abt that incident anymore

 

 **shookeith:** i'll tell u when i win.

 

 **lonce mcclain:** suddenly i have the strong urge to lose

 

 **shookeith:** u dont have to

 

 **shookeith:** you'll lose either way lmao

 

 **death take me now:** Andddd we'll stop right there

 

 **lonce mcclain:** fucka u

 

 **shookeith:** <3

 

 

 

 

**the golden trio ( 12:32 PM )**

 

 

 **LEGendary:** fellas is it gay if your heart beats faster when a guy sends u a heart?

 

 **tide podge:** thats heart transplant

 

 **LEGendary:** oVER A TEXT PIDGE 

 

 **LEGendary:** oVER THE FUCKING TEXT

 

 **hunkuna matata:** yes it is

 

 **tide podge:** yup totally 

 

 **LEGendary:** um?? no its not???

 

 **LEGendary:** iTS CUZ I WAS RUNNING AND ITS STILL BEATING FASTER THAN NORMAL

 

 **hunkuna matata:** whatever u say, buddy

 

 **LEGendary:** it! is! tru!

 

 **hunkuna matata:** i said okay

 

 **LEGendary:** I DONT LIKE HIM LIKE THAT

 

 **LEGendary:** i just think he's cute!!

 

 **hunkuna matata:** cute, you say?

 

 **LEGendary:** yea?

 

 **tide podge:** oh my god when will he go to the next stage

 

 **hunkuna matata:** 30 bucks say this week

 

 **tide podge:** ure on

 

 **LEGendary:** iM STILL HERE ???

 

 **hunkuna matata:** its for ur own good bro

 

 **LEGendary:** fuk u

 

 

 

 

**mclame >>> pudge **

 

 **mclame:** ey boi

 

 **podge:** no

 

 **mclame:** i?? havent say anything??

 

 **podge:** i dont kno wat u want but i dont want to do it

 

 **mclame:** boo u whore

 

 **podge:** did u just call me a whore

 

 **podge:** LANC E

 

 

 

 

**hijo de puta >>> bloody shit**

 

 

 **hijo de puta:** Allura ~~~

 

 **bloody shit:** read ( 09:23 PM )

 

 **hijo de puta:** fucc u

 

 **bloody shit:** :)

 

 

 

 

**lancey lance >>> shiro the hero**

 

 

 **lancey lance:** Shiro :3c

 

**[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]**

 

 **lancey lance:** yOU STILL BLOCKED ME???

 

**[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]**

 

 **lancey lance:** fUCK U SHIRO

 

**[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]**

 

 

 

 

**lans lose his pants >>> matt is under the mat**

 

 

 **lans lose his pants:** fellas

 

 **lans lose his pants:** how does one describe a crush

 

 **matt is under the mat:** ôwô does someone has the crush on someone else??

 

 **lans lose his pants:** answer the fcking question, u gay

 

 **matt is under the mat:** technically im bi

 

 **lans lose his pants:** ayeee /finger guns/

 

 **matt is under the mat:** ayeee /finger guns/

 

 **matt is under the mat:** but why does one asked i, the sparkly anime boi?

 

 **lans lose his pants:** because i, also a sparkly boi, needs thy help

 

 **lans lose his pants:** so tell me thy answer for i need it

 

 **lans lose his pants:** also, i knoweth thou hast the crush on a wild Takashi Shirogane

 

 **matt is under the mat:** i dont rlly know what you just said

 

 **matt is under the mat:** also why are you making Shiro like a pokémon?

 

 **lans lose his pants:** because thou wants to catch him

 

 **lans lose his pants:** it is thy destiny

 

 **matt is under the mat:** stop changing the pokémon theme song

 

 **matt is under the mat:** waIT

 

 **matt is under the mat:** why iS SHIRO THERE????

 

 **lans lose his pants:** u aint slick, motherfucker

 

 **matt is under the mat:** NCDJNCDN WDYM BRUHHH

 

 **lans lose his pants:** uhh?? u like shiro???? duhhh

 

 **matt is under the mat:** ,,,,biHHHHH

 

 **lans lose his pants:** what???

 

 **matt is under the mat:** IM NOT GAY FOR SHIRO

 

 **matt is under the mat:** HE HAS A BF WTF BRUHH

 

 **lans lose his pants:** HE HAS A WHAT

 

 **matt is under the mat:** i mean,,,

 

 **matt is under the mat:** it;s not like they're dating per se

 

 **matt is under the mat:** more like flirting but didnt actually continue that far??? 

 

 **lans lose his pants:** okAy

 

 **lans lose his pants:** ignoring shiro and secret bf's shits

 

 **lans lose his pants:** hELP ME

 

 **matt is under the mat:**??? no??? 

 

 **lans lose his pants:** oH COME O N

 

 **lans lose his pants:** HELP M E MATTHEW-ONE-KENOBI

 

 **matt is under the mat:** thats not my name

 

 **lans lose his pants:** yOU ARE MY ONLY AND LAST HOPE OWO

**matt is under the mat:** i bet i was the last person u went to

 

 **lans lose his pants:** tHATS WHERE URE WRONG BROTHER

 

 **matt is under the mat:** ówò ??

 

 **lans lose his pants:** you were the LAST THREE person i went to

 

 **lans lose his pants:** the last one is Keith and Hunk

 

 **matt is under the mat:** why??

 

 **lans lose his pants:** Hunk cant keep a secret even if his life depended on it

 

 **matt is under the mat:** tru dat amen

 

 **lans lose his pants:** and Keith has like, no lovelife at all

 

 **lans lose his pants:** im 99% sure he never dated

 

 **matt is under the mat:** thats where ure wrong 

 

 **lans lose his pants:** wat

 

 **matt is under the mat:** wat

 

 **matt is under the mat:** okay so u wanna know if u hv a crush yes?

 

 **lans lose his pants:** yes

 

 **matt is under the mat:** first, you gotta make sure theyre ure type

 

 **matt is under the mat:** make a list of your type of s/o and then cross it if theyre qualified

 

 **matt is under the mat:** physically, mentally and emotionally

 

 **lans lose his pants:** oki

 

 **lans lose his pants:** thats it??

 

 **matt is under the mat:** pft nah fam

 

 **matt is under the mat:** next check yourself

 

 **matt is under the mat:** are u obssesed of them? do u constantly try to have their attention to you? are you unhappy seeing them or having their attention on somebody else that looks like their type? do you want to stay close to them and always near them? 

 

 **matt is under the mat:** if ure ok seeing them w others, thats just admiration

 

 **matt is under the mat:** other than that, you hv a crush

 

 **lans lose his pants:** how did u even kno all this shit

 

 **matt is under the mat:** there is this thing called internet sweetie

 

 **lans lose his pants:** you searched in tumblr didnt u

 

 **matt is under the mat:** thE AUDACITY,,,,,, I DO NOT USE TUMBLR AND I HATE THOSE AESTHETIC SHITPOSTERS APPLICATION. IN THIS ESSAY I WILL

 

 **lans lose his pants:** u literally just used a tumblr meme

 

 **matt is under the mat:** u got me there

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

 _Okay,_ Lance thought, _let's do this thing._ Lance is in his dorm, alone — because Hunk wants to stay with his not-girlfriend and Pidge is hanging out at Shiro's for the costume, and is sitting on his desk, a white blank paper on top of it. He was holding a pencil with his left hand while using the other one to check his phone. 

 

_Make a list of your type for a significant other._

 

Writing all about his type in a girl or boy? No problem!

 

Oh who is he kidding, _it's a goddamn problem._

 

After many hours (read: 40 minutes 22 seconds), Lance had come out victorious. He was raising the paper — which is no longer blank and instead full of letters and drawings (Lance was bored, fuck off), to the ceiling, as if it was a trophy and there is a huge grin decorating his face, proud of his achievement.

 

Next step; _cross the one if they're qualified physically, mentally and emotionally._

 

This is the hard ones.

 

Lance looked at the paper at hand, re-reading it.

 

**1\. Long hair**

**2\. Pretty eyes**

**3. ~~uwu owo awa lmfao i gotta stop~~ ass aSS ASS ASS ASS**

**4\. oblivious i guess?? its kinda cute ~~uwu~~**

**5\. cute cuTE CUTE CUTE CUTE AHHH**

**6. ~~damn im bad at this shit~~ challenging**

**7\. shy?? flustered??**

**8\. but also bold at the same time and takes no shit**

**9. ~~this sure as hell reminds me of Nyma~~ a softie**

**10\. sexy lmao**

**11\. um always comfort me?? and help me and smth**

**12\. sympathetic**

**13\. kind?? but also a bit tough??**

 

Lance sighed, hitting his head on the table and winces. It fucking hurts. Lance turned his head slightly and started crossing the numbers, after all, it's a lot of numbers, there are huge possiblities where half of these aren't crossed. 

 

 

 

**> >>**

 

 

 

 _Fuck, fuck, fuck_.

 

Lance could not believe his eyes. The paper is in his hand, gripped tightly. _What the fuck..._

 

Lance screamed in frustration and banged his head again. Hard.

 

"Lance!" Pidge's voice could be heard from outside of the door, "what the fuck was that?!" and an afterthought, "did you bang your head on your desk again? Lance, that shit is expensive,"

 

"Fuck off!" Lance shot him a middle finger — not that Pidge could see him, and stared again at the _stupid, disgusting and filthy_ paper.

 

The paper, which is full of the list of his type, are all crossed — the whole thirteen of it. Even the number thirteen and twelve! Which means...

 

Lance banged his head on the desk again, ignoring Pidge's screaming of _"Lance, quiet down!"_

_@ God why out of all people in the whole world did I have a crush on Keith Kogane?!_

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The crush test is a test that I made to make sure whether or not I have a crush / attraction / admiration on some boys / girls. Use it if you want.
> 
> Also finally Lance discovers his crush on Keith (fucking finally)
> 
> Kudos and comments are deeply appreciated!


	12. a trainu wrekku

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It gets gayer.  
> Slowly.  
> Because slowburn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> after longass time ive finally updated uwu  
> sorry for the long wait, school is an asshole and so am i  
> ive been focusIng on school and my art lol  
> im sorry that this is so damn short i was in a hella hurry :((  
> i tried a new style of writing this fic to see whether this is better or not  
> EDITED: turns out it wasnt short after all LMAO

**haloweed ( 12:00 AM )**

 

 **cherry bomb:** Are you guys ready

 

 **cherry bomb:**  For the best fucking day of your life

 

 **death take me now:**  watch ur languange at this buttcrack oclock allura

 

 **green alien:**  hdjxjsjsj cockblocked immediately by mr dad

 

 **cherry bomb:**  >:( No you

 

 **death take me now:**  take your beauty sleep

 

 **death take me now:**  everyone knows you need it pidge

 

 **mattchiato:**  oOOOHHH BURN BY DAD

 

 **cherry bomb:**  DRAG THAT BITCH SHIRO

 

 **green alien:** the fucking audacity

 

 **green alien:** ://///

 

 **shookeith:** shut the fuck uPPPPPPPP

 

 **mattchiato:** what keith says guys

 

 **shookeith:** i wAS FUCKING TALKING TO YOU, YOU MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF COCKSLUT.

 

 **shookeith:** YOU BETTER SHUT YOUR SHITTY PLAYLIST AND GO TO YOUR FUCKING STUPID BED YOU DICKHEAD

 

 **mattchiato:**... im sowwy uwu

 

 **mattchiato:** hajjKjjklllkOokamkll

 

 **green alien:** matt???

 

 **cherry bomb:** mattie???

 

 **death take me now:** oh my fucking god he fucking ded

 

 **green alien:** hajjsjsjsm

 

 **green alien:** EARLY SHIRO IS BEST SHIRO

 

 

_**NOTIFICATION UPDATE** _

 

 _Hello ShitTalkers! Guess who's here with an update? We are! On this Oct 31 we release many nee things for you all to try! From photos and videos filters to GIFs to meme and expression pictures! Note that you have to update in order to continue using this app and NOTE that hacking is not allowed again (we're looking at you, initial P.G.). Also reminder that_ _your username will automatically changed into your first username to disperse confusion._

 _In this newly updated ShitTalk, you'll find many amazing things include_ ...read more

 

Update application: ShitTalk?

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_Updating..._

 

 

**haloweed**

**( 09:47 AM )**

 

 

**pink is the new black**

My heaRT WILL

 

**matt's biggest fan**

fuck la la la la HEY

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

fuck la la in the moRNING

 

**(sh)akiraaaa**

what are you guys even doing?

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

singing.

dUH

 

**a username**

actually lance, its typing

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

um no its singing

i would know i joined the quaior

 

**(sh)akiraaaa**

the what now.

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

yOu knOwWWW

the uhhh singing group thing??

 

**pink is the new black**

The choir?

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

THATS THE BITCH

 

**matt's biggest fan**

ure shitting me

u didnt know how to spell choir

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

lmaOOOOO

OH SHIT IM SHITTING MYSELF

 

**(sh)akiraaaa**

no you're not.

you're just snorting your ass off.

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

can a guy dream???

let me be funny keithers

 

**a username**

wait

shakira is keith????

 

**matt's biggest fan**

uhh yeah???

who did u think shakira was??

 

**a username**

lance????

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

bitch im fucking here with my longass name

 

**a username**

ohhh

thanks matt

 

**matt's biggest fan**

..... im not matt

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

IM MATT

also lol pidge

 

**matt's biggest fan**

fuCkA u

 

**leamdro charles serrano-mcclain**

wait if ballerina tutuboy is matt 

the which is allura????

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

its ballerina tutuhead u uncultured bitch

 

**pink is the new black**

I

I'm here????

You know lets roll call

Allura

 

**matt's biggest fan**

pidge

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

matt

 

**a username**

hunk

 

**(sh)akiraaaa**

keith

@/shiro wants to sleep is obviously shiro

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

literally everyone knows who i am

except maybe hUNK

 

**a username**

wELL IM SORRY THAT YOUR NAME IS SO LONG

HECK ITS LONGER THAN YOUR GANGLY ARMS

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

ignoring hunks brutal comment on my ego and arms and also name

how long until we could change our name back?

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Tomorrow.

Did none of you read the update notifications?

 

**pink is the new black**

Shiro, not everyone wants to read it like you.

 

**matt's biggest fan**

and most people only clicked it because impulse

 

**(sh)akiraaaa**

true.

 

**pink is the new black**

Anyway I'll be waiting for all of you losers to come to my dorm

AKA castle

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

WE'LL BE LICKING ALL OF YOUR ASSES

wait no

 

**a username**

hsjnsjjsjka

LICKING

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

u into salad tossing??

lmao

 

**(sh)akiraaaa**

wtf is salad tossing and why should you toss it away.

that's wasting food.

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Lance. Do not corrupt Keith. 

He's far too innocent for this.

 

**a username**

aND ME

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

IM SORRY

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Well sorry doesn't sweeten my tea.

 

**pink is the new black**

The only tea you need is beauTEA

 

**shiro wants sleep**

The only beauty I need is beauty sleep.

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

bitch pls ure already beauty wtf u wanna blind us w ur handsomeness next

 

**matt's biggest fan**

^ whole ass mood

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

THE POINT STILL STANDS

IM GONNA KICK ALL YOUR ASSES

 

**(sh)akiraaaa**

*all yall

 

**leandro charles serrano-mcclain**

I SWEAR U TEXAN SHIT

 

 

 

**haloweed ( 08:23 AM )**

 

 

 **matt's biggest fan** _changed_ **haloweed** _to_ **boom bitch**

 

 **matt's biggest fan** _changed_ **matt's biggest fan** _name to_ **pidgekachu**

**pidgekachu**

finally i could change my name

also eVERYONE CHANGE YOUR STUPID NAME

 

 **leandro charles serrano-mcclain** _changed_ **(sh)akiraaa** _name to_ **keithers**

 

 **leandro charles serrano-mcclain** _changed_ **leandro charles serrano-mcclain** _name to_ **lance lance revolution**

 

 **a username** _changed_ **a username** _name to_ **titanic hunks**

 

**titanic hunks**

well im bored

 

**lance lance revolution**

sAmE

 

 **pink is the new black** _changed_ **pink is the new black** _name to_ **pan** **queen**

 

**pan queen**

Same bruh :'/

 

**pidgekachu**

LETS PLAY A GAME

 

**lance lance revolution**

okay

sure

whateves

what game

 

**pidgekachu**

first off the whateves makes u sound like a white blonde cheerleader bitch who vapes into her bf's mouth

 

**lance lance revolution**

/flips hair/ how dare

 

**pidgekachu**

second,

the game is called allura or keith

 

**pan queen**

Bruh

 

**keithers**

...why tho.

 

**pidgekachu**

LET ME EXPLAIN JESUS

**ballerina tutuhead**

arent u jewish pidge?? :///

 

**pidgekachu**

blocked and reported for cyber bullying

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

awwwsss :'((((

 

**titanic hunks**

pidge

bored

game

focus

 

**pidgekachu**

oh right yeah

so i'll say a sentence and youll guess which of our gays said that

 

**lance lance revolution**

sounds stupid

im in

 

**titanic hunks**

same do ur worst pidge

 

**pan queen**

Okay this seems fun actually

Do it

 

**keithers**

i dont even care anymore.

 

**pidgekachu**

yes matt u can join i saw ure typing some shit

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

its nice to know that ur lil sibs knows what u wanna type :)))

 

**pidgekachu**

yeah yeah enough w that shit

lets start

who says this: "ohmygoddd that ass"

 

**titanic hunks**

...allura?

 

**lance lance revolution**

keef

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

both

 

**pidgekachu**

it was allura

keith is a leggy boi

he has foot fetish

 

**keithers**

why.

just because i like legs doesn't mean i have foot fetish.

 

**lance lance revolution**

aLLURA WHY

also it kinda does, buddy ://

 

pan queen

Well,,,,

It was a great ass okayyyyy

;( Panphobia

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

...do i win?

 

**pidgekachu**

no

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

awww ;(((

 

**pidgekachu**

next question

"my first kiss went a little like this....

IT TWIST!!!! (chugs beer)"

 

**lance lance revolution**

defo allura

 

**titanic hunks**

what lance says

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

alloooowAaaa

 

pan queen

STOP EXPOSING ME

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Allura, I expect more from you.

Actually I'm not surprised.

Just disappointed.

_[ image ]_

 

pan queen

Stop memeing dad

Also, it was ROOT BEER!!

 

**keithers**

i want root beer.

matt, buy me root beer.

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

on it fam

 

**lance lance revolution**

what are their friendship state actually?

 

pan queen

... Uh

Friendly slave and master?

 

**keithers**

nsjsksmsmm whAT THE FUCK ALLURA

 

**titanic hunks**

wait so keith's the dom?

wow

 

**pidgekachu**

guys

 

**lance lance revolution**

huh but keith looks like a sub ://

hey keith are u a sub?

 

**keithers**

i am NOT answering that what the fuck.

 

**pidgekachu**

GUYS CAN WE PLEASE FOCUS ON MY GAME THANK YOU

 

**titanic hunks**

oh right sorry pidge

so is allura correct?

 

**pidgekachu**

thats right!! hunk is leading yall

finally to the next round 

next: "everytime i look at girls i sigh"

 

**titanic hunks**

.....

okay ill be honest

i cant decide on whether it was keith or allura

 

**lance lance revolution**

on one hand, it could be a really gay man sighing sadly at seeing girls

on the other hand, it could _also_ be someone who likes girls so much and sighs happily seeing them

and if i had a third hand, it could also be both saying it at once

 

pan queen

Which is a perfectly good time to never play this game again, dont you think keith? :)

 

**keithers**

what.

 

pan queen

Right :)

 

**keithers**

...

why is there a smile.

you know what yeah sure idc.

pidge is just exposing you anyway.

 

**lance lance revolution**

nxjsjsjjs aLLURA????

 

pan queen

This conversation is over

Keith, starts a new one now

 

**keithers**

why me.

 

pan queen

Because im a PAN and a QUEEN 

Now do it

 

**keithers**

...

so who wins the haloween challenge?

 

**lance lance revolution**

UM me???!?

 

pan queen

/COUGHS HARD/

 

**lance lance revolution**

and allura i guess :/

 

pan queen

;( Rudeass bitch

Also no, we did not win

The Wants2Die team wins

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Unfortunately.

 

**keithers**

stop lurking bitch.

 

**shiro wants sleep**

I'll stop lurking when you stop drinking milk and eating ice cream.

 

**keithers**

...

lurk all you want it's a real free estate

 

**pidgekachu**

snisksms

of all ppl its the broganes who meme first

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

I HAVE COME BACK 

AND I HAVE BOUGHT AND ALSO BROUGHT THE ROOT BEER

 

**keithers**

good.

now hand it over.

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

uM rude :///

 

**titanic hunks**

awww congrats guys!!!

anyway why dont we all go to class? im sure all of you have one

 

**lance lance revolution**

why are u such a mom

 

**titanic hunks**

say goodbye to your garlic knots lance

 

**lance lance revolution**

WAIT IM SOWWY UWU

I WOULD DO ANWYTWING FOW YEW HWUNK UWU

 

**titanic hunks**

anything?

 

**lance lance revolution**

ANWYTWING UWU

 

**titanic hunks**

then perish

 

**lance lance revolution**

ÓwÒ ???? nande

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

wtf is this

eh ill join

IVE GOT THE POWER OF GOD AND ANIME ON MY SIDE

AHHHHJJHHH

 

pan queen

I WONT HESITATE BITCHES

 

**pidgekachu**

and then there was one

only one person who havent meme

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

sHAME ON YOU PIDGE

I RAISED U TO BE A MEME AND U FAILED ME

 

**keithers**

matt this is _not_ root beer at all

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

lawlz uwu

 

 

 

**boom bitch ( 04:22 PM )**

 

 

**lance lance revolution**

GUYS GUYS GUYS

HUNK BROKE MY ARMKLE

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

WHATTTT

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED AND WHY THE HECK WAS I NOT THERE TO SEE IT

 

**titanic hunks**

DUDE I SAID I WAS SORRY

AND IT WASNT BROKEN WTF

 

pan queen

His what now

 

**shiro wants sleep**

According to Lance, his armkle

 

**pidgekachu**

his wrist

hunk broke his wrist

 

**titanic hunks**

ITS NOT BROKEN

is it???

wait is it really broken???

dude im so sorry sjjsnxjskal

 

**lance lance revolution**

wAIT NO NO I WAS JUST JOKING

only a bruise lol

 

**titanic hunks**

://

this is why i told you not to do the Bro Handshake with me right now

im stressed

 

**lance lance revolution**

well who else should i do it with?? :((

pidge forgets it halfway

allura is too far

matt is out there somewhere

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

im right here bih

 

**lance lance revolution**

shiro is doing god knows what

 

**titanic hunks**

what abt keith?

 

**lance lance revolution**

HA

KEITH????

KEITH HA

NICE JOKE HUNK

KEITH DOESNT EVEN _WANT_ TO REMEMBER IT

 

**keithers**

it's true i don't want to.

 

**titanic hunks**

that's.... not surprising in any way

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

lmao dont have high expectation on this kind of thing w keith, lance

ull only hurt urself in the end :3

 

pan queen

Stop being so dramatic

Besides im sure keith will come around, lance

Trust me uwu

 

**pidgekachu**

the uwu makes me trust u less

 

**lance lance revolution**

^^^^

even shiro remembers it all :(((

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Don't bring my name on this, Lance.

I don't want to be apart of you and Keith's "very special and important" argument.

 

pan queen

Argument? Is that what you kids say instead of flirting these days?

 

**pidgekachu**

youre..... three years older than us wtf

 

pan queen

Shhhhh

 

**lance lance revolution**

were not?? flirting??

allura check your glasses

**titanic hunks**

technically alluras four yrs older than u pidge

 

**pidgekachu**

pSH

""""""technicalities""""""

 

pan queen

I dont use glasses

 

**lance lance revolution**

then u need one

asap

 

**keithers**

sigh,,,

it all started with handshakes.

 

**titanic hunks**

keith, for lance's sake

i think u should learn those handshakes

 

**keithers**

i dont get it???

like,,,,

why should i learn those stupid and useless handshakes??

 

**lance lance revolution**

your inability to perform such complicated handshakes iS TEARING THE WHOLE TEAM APART YOU FUCKTARD

 

**keithers**

FINE THEN WHY DON'T YOU JUST COME HERE AND TEACH ME BITCH

 

**lance lance revolution**

IM ON MY WAY UNLOCK YOUR FUCKING DOOR

 

pan queen

That was so smooth wtf

 

**pidgekachu**

this chat is a trainwreck

 

 

 

 

**lancing thru the snow >>> matt is short for matt**

 

 

**lancing thru the snow**

sjksmskms dude im going to keith's dorm???

aka my crush that i realized thanks to u

 

**matt is short for matt**

yes i know

i have eyes and i saw the gc

the door's unlocked btw

 

**lancing thru the snow**

thanks bae uwu

bUt iTS MY CRUSH MATT DONT U UNDERSTAND

ITS LIKE GOING TO UR CRUSH'S HOME AND DID SOMETHING ALONE

WITHOUT ANY OF OUR OTHER FRIENDS WWHANDJDJ

 

**matt is short for matt**

okay that kinda sounds nice 

except for maybe the fact that i turned into a stupid bitch whenever they're nearby and sprouts out the weirdest shit i could think of

also one flaw: im still in the dorm

 

**lancing thru the snow**

wHa

what do u mean youre in his dorm????

are u fucking keith???? 

because not cool dude i told u my crush in confidence

**matt is short for matt**

i,,,,

i fucking lived there too???? jfc bruh 

me and keith has the same dorm remember???

 

**lancing thru the snow**

oh yeah lmao i forgot

so uhh can u 

u kno

"leave the dorm"

 

**matt is short for matt**

excuse me

say what now

are u kicking me out of my own dorm????

 

**lancing thru the snow**

Dear Matt,

Can you please leave the dorm so I could have Keith to myself for awhile? It would be very nice of you to do as I seem to have a crush on your friend slash dormmate. Had you left, Keith and I would have the dorm to ourselves and we could discuss about many things and maybe some clue whether Keith likes me or not in private. Thank you for understanding and leaving the dorm.

Sincerely,

Lance xoxoxox

 

**matt is short for matt**

... did u srsly write sincerely, lance there 

 

**lancing thru the snow**

pLEASE MATT

 

**matt is short for matt**

fine,,,,,

ill borrow keiths bike and went out somewhere

 

**lancing thru the snow**

thanks matt ure the best xoxoxoxo

 

**matt is short for matt**

...

lance

this may seem rude but

why didnt u tell hunk and pidge about keith?

 

**lancing thru the snow**

its ok its not rude

im just

not ready yet to tell them

 

**matt is short for matt**

why? arent hey your best friends?

 

**lancing thru the snow**

call it a bad experience that i learnt, matt

trust me if i could i wouldnt even tell you

 

 

 

 

**boom bitch ( 05:17 PM )**

 

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

quick question

if u wanna ride keiths bike and u hv no helmet should i ride it?

 

**shiro wants sleep**

No.

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

why

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Because it's not safe.

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

but why should i wear thatttt

its LAME 

like pidge

 

**pidgekachu**

hey fuck u too man

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

<3

 

**shiro wants sleep**

You know what's not lame?

Safety.

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

:((( 

keefers,,,, 

stop talking w lance and check the gc

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

_@keithers_

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

_@keithers_

  

**ballerina tutuhead**

_@keithers_ bitch

  

**ballerina tutuhead**

_@keithers_ stop sucking face w lance and answer me

 

**keithers**

first: i was and am _not_ sucking face with lance. 

second: what the hell do you want now?

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

wheres ur helmet thingie

 

**keithers**

its like ur ass

non existent

**ballerina** **tutuhead**

slander.

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Keith...

 

**keithers**

snksks,s,

hey shiro uwu its lancey lance

keefers here wont be answering any chat until he remembers all the handshakes ty xoxoxoxo

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

lmao aight

shiro bro imma crash @ ur place 

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Door's unlocked.

Bring popcorns.

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

will do love u uwu

<333

 

**shiro wants sleep**

read ( 05:32 PM )

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

smh rude ://// 

pidge would never do me like this

 

**pidgekachu**

uh yeah i would

maybe even worse than what shiro did lmao

 

**titanic hunks**

actually ive been wondering

where did pidge name came from?

 

**pidgekachu**

i spent three quarter of my life thinking my name was pidge instead of katie when i was young

uhh matt nicknamed me that when i was three or five?

(thank god it was an unisex name)

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

i called her/him pidge cuz she/he used to really love pidgeotto from pokémon and wanted to be called that

it was so cute especially when he/she wears that costume for haloween at eight

:') i would love to send a pic of it but im too scared that she/he will try and kill me

 

**pidgekachu**

good >:)

also its he/him

 

**titanic hunks**

awww thats so cuteeee

 

pan queen

Say that louder to the people at the back

 

**shiro wants sleep**

False.

He once called Pidge bitch in public when he was eight and said that its his nickname.

I quote: "I didn't say bitch! I say Pidge! It was her nickname!"

 

**titanic hunks**

andddd moment's ruined

 

pan queen

Should've known it was too good to be true 

Shame on you matt

 

**pidgekachu**

I CANNOT BELIEVE I WAS LIED TO

MATT HOW COULD YOU

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

lmao i couldn't believe you couldn't believe that 

also shiro where in fucking hell did u found out

 

**shiro wants sleep**

Keith told me.

But drunk-you clarified it to me.

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

that motherfucking piece of ass

i told him that in confidence

 

**keithers**

no you didnt

you were drunk when you told me that

at least, thats what keith says lol

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

well tell keith he could say his nutella goodbye

 

**keithers**

keith says that he will kill you in a rated-x style

 

**ballerina tutuhead**

:///

shiro im going in two min

 

 

 

**The Golden Trio ( 07:33 PM )**

 

 

**LEGendary**

yo guys im staying over at keiths

 

**hunkuna matata**

aight boo take care

 

**tide podge**

hmmmm,,,,

inch resting

so u and keith are buddy buddy now huhhh

 

**LEGendary**

yea hes cool

why

 

**tide podge**

oH nothing lol

 

**LEGendary**

:| okay?

 

 

 

 

**pidge the frog >>> (c)hunky bar**

 

 

**pidge the frog**

operation klance?

 

**(c)hunky bar**

u mean operation laith

because if it is then yeah 

 

**pidge the frog**

for the last flipping time we are not naming the operation laith 

its too soft for such dangerous boys

 

**(c)hunky bar**

dont you mean

 _laith-al_ boys lmaoooo

 

**pidge the frog**

you spent too much time w shiro and keith

but whatever yeah it is

operation klance slash laith slash whatever the hell u want to name it is a go?

 

**(c)hunky bar**

lets do this >:)

 

 

 

**___________________**

 

_ShitTalk ID Account: **@leandroserrano-mcclain**_

 

_ > GROUPCHAT (2)_

_> PRIVATE MESSAGE (29)_

_> FAVORITE ACCOUNT (12)_

_> BLOCKED ACCOUNT (109)_

_**> SETTINGS** _

 

_... open settings_

 

_• PRIVACY_

_• BIO_

_• MANAGE TEXT_

_• EDIT ACCOUNT_

_• HIDE (8)_

_• LOGOUT_

_• ACTIVITY_

_**• DELETED MESSAGE (1)** _

 

_Open Message?_

_**[ Yes ]** [ No ]_

 

_... open deleted message_

_REMINDER: DELETED MESSAGE WILL BE GONE IN 29 DAYS_

 

**lancing thru the snow >>> matt is short for matt **

 

 

**lancing thru the snow**

matt be a buddy for me and dont tell anyone abt my crush

or even any info abt my feelings abt keith pls and ty

may shiro loves ur flat ass and may ur ass get bigger

 

**matt is short for matt**

you make it really hard for me to keep this a secret lance

but sure i guess

aLSO MY ASS AINT FLAT WTF 

 

**lancing thru the snow**

yes it is

check ur glasses

 

**matt is short for matt**

i 

my eyes are clear now wtf ive done surgery lance

 

**lancing thru the snow**

well u got a bad doctor

now delete this chat thanks bae

 

**matt is short for matt**

muah muah baybeh

 

**____________________**

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhh next chapter will be either the haloween party OR the next groupchat :)  
> anyway i subtly unlocked TWO arc so youre welcome yall  
> as always comments and kudos are appreciated  
> also: check out my other stories too!!


	13. [ DISCONTINUED ]

To anyone who's waiting for a new chapter, I'm sorry but I won't be continuing this anymore.

The truth is I've been very unmotivated to finish this and I lost interest in it since September, all the plots and ideas gone.

I don't really want to post this but I just don't want to give anyone hope for a new chapter.

So yeah.

This is it, if you're reading this thanks for being a faithful person and sorry that you waited for nothing.

This story has been officially discontinued.


End file.
